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I sometimes have nightmares.

As a child, I was afraid of things I couldn’t understand. Ghosts under my bed or monsters in the dark forest. Those imaginary fears would manifest as nightmares, leaving me restless.

As I grew older, I stopped having those nightmares. Instead, my past experiences would surface as dreams. Horrific memories, deep-seated wounds in my heart, would vividly replay, robbing me of sleep.

On nights when such terrible dreams plagued me, I would recklessly throw myself at the ghosts or monsters I once feared. After all, I was no longer afraid of what lurked under my bed or in the dark woods.

But there was a time when nightmares vanished from my life.

That was when Charlotte was by my side.

Whenever I was tormented by nightmares, Charlotte would cast calming spells and rest my head on her lap while singing.

The only songs she knew were hymns learned at the orphanage, but on those nights, I could fall asleep peacefully, free of nightmares.

Just like now.

“……”

When I opened my eyes in the morning, my mind felt clear and refreshed.

The deep-seated emotions of anger, hatred, sadness, and resentment had quietly settled at the bottom of a deep lake within my heart.

They hadn’t disappeared, stuck beneath the surface of my consciousness. But at the same time, they hadn’t surfaced either. If I wanted, I could draw those feelings up again, but for now, they remained hidden away.

But where am I?

As I looked around, I found myself in an entirely white room. I was lying on a bed, and the essentials were neatly arranged as if there was no trace of its owner.

The room was tidy but felt a bit empty.

I clearly remembered that dark magic had surged, and up until the last moment I saw Charlotte… Did she bring me here?

At that moment, I heard footsteps approaching the room. The owner of the footsteps hesitated for a moment at the door and then carefully opened it, peeking inside.

And then our eyes met.

It was Charlotte.

“…!”

Seeing me made Charlotte jump back in surprise and she hurriedly closed the door. Before she could turn away, I called out first.

“Wait.”

I could feel her hesitating outside, unable to decide whether to enter or not.

I let out a short sigh.

Instinctively, I had called out to her, but now I was at a loss for what to say. However, I couldn’t just leave her standing at the door, so after a brief moment of hesitation, I spoke again.

“…Come in. Let’s talk for a bit.”

“……”

Charlotte cautiously peeked her head through the door.

*

“……”

“……”

This is awkward.

It wasn’t just me; Charlotte, sitting in the chair next to my bed, wore an equally awkward expression.

She wouldn’t even meet my gaze and kept her head bowed, fiddling with her fingers. It was a habit she often displayed when she felt uncomfortable.

In the end, I was the one to break the silence.

Since we weren’t exactly the closest of friends, I decided to ask the most pressing question first.

“I assume the dark magic was surging. Did you calm me down?”

Charlotte nodded her head slightly.

“Just as I thought.”

It was something I had already suspected, so it didn’t really surprise me. To suppress that level of dark magic, corresponding divine power would be necessary.

Only someone like Charlotte, known as the Saintess, who focused solely on combat like the great warrior, could wield such magic on her own.

I expressed my gratitude honestly.

“Anyway… Thank you. You helped me calm down quickly.”

I didn’t know how she knew to find me, but if Charlotte hadn’t appeared at that moment, I would have been spreading dark magic everywhere for a long time. Even if I tried to get away from people, significant damage would likely have occurred in that time.

It was only natural to thank her, but Charlotte blinked her eyes wide, as if she hadn’t expected such a response.

“……”

Then she offered a faint smile, as if it was just part of her duty.

Charlotte hesitated as if deeply contemplating something, then cautiously gathered divine power at her fingertips. She began writing in the air for me to see.

[I’ve purified the area, so don’t worry.]

“Hmm….”

Since Charlotte hadn’t spoken a single word since starting the conversation, I couldn’t help but bring up the question that had been bothering me all along.

“I heard you were mute… Is that true?”

Charlotte’s expression darkened for a moment.

She nodded her head very slightly. It was a clear affirmation.

After she left, I had inevitably heard bits and pieces about her. The movements of that hero party had drawn the interest of countless citizens in the empire.

But what I couldn’t understand was the news of Charlotte becoming mute. When she had left, she had seemed perfectly fine, yet suddenly the title of ‘Silent Priestess’ was attached to her.

There was a rumor that she had given her voice to the goddess for blessings to defeat the Demon King, but whether that was the truth or not, I had no way of knowing.

“What’s the reason?”

Charlotte slowly shook her head, as if unable to speak about it.

Looking into her downcast eyes, filled with deep and dark emotions, I instinctively knew that any words I said wouldn’t elicit a response.

In the end, I decided to drop the question about her muteness.

I would change the subject instead.

“Where am I? This doesn’t seem like the Imperial Palace.”

[This is my room in the Cathedral. I thought it wouldn’t be good to leave you at the Imperial Palace. I’m sorry for moving you without permission.]

“I don’t mind about that. But… this is your room?”

The fact that Charlotte lived in this stark room with not a single personal item aside was one thing, but it dawned on me that the bed I had been lying in was indeed Charlotte’s.

Charlotte’s face flushed red with embarrassment, and she hurriedly wrote more.

[This is the only place people don’t easily find. It may be called my room, but I hardly used it for years. I needed somewhere to stay after arriving in the Capital, so I have used it for a few days, but the bedding is all new, so you don’t have to worry.]

“Ah, got it… I understand.”

If Charlotte wasn’t troubled by it, then I didn’t feel the need to worry. After all, there was a time when sharing the same bed seemed completely natural.

And then an awkward silence filled the room.

I had already asked everything I wanted to know, and Charlotte looked utterly unsure about how to handle the situation of conversing with me from the start.

Looking at her, I felt something strange.

There was once a time I wanted to ask Charlotte why she left me. Every time I thought of the hero who took her away, anger surged within me, and each time I remembered her departure, it felt like a knife cutting open my heart.

But right now, in this moment, 15 years later, as I meet her and converse, my heart felt incredibly calm.

This serenity wasn’t because of any tranquil mind or Charlotte’s magic; it was simply that my affection for Charlotte had faded over time like a distant memory.

The wounds had left scars, but they had healed in their own way, and my love for her had become a recollection of “There were those times.”

Having burned everything over the last 15 years, nothing remained except a pile of cold ashes where even the last embers had extinguished.

That’s why I decided to ask something else.

In an informal tone, like meeting an old acquaintance after a long time.

“Have you been well?”

Charlotte made a sad face at my question but offered neither a yes nor a no. She seemed genuinely unsure how to respond.

“After the war ended, you were still near the borders. Wasn’t it tough?”

[It was something I had to do. I needed to purify the tainted land.]

She answered as if it was an obligation, but even now, long after the war had ended and despite countless soldiers, including the Seven Heroes of the continent, returning home, Charlotte remained in the land of chaos.

It felt like an action rooted in her own guilt. Perhaps she couldn’t leave the battlefield due to the people she couldn’t protect.

“You don’t have to do that.”

“……?”

“I mean, you don’t need to keep sacrificing yourself.”

There were certainly many people Charlotte couldn’t save.

But true to her title as the Saintess of the battlefield, she had saved many lives, too.

Other hero parties and the Seven Heroes of the continent, and even I myself, are now trying to lead our lives away from the battlefield. Yet, Charlotte was still stuck there, and it slightly concerned me.

I hoped she would stop wearing such a guilt-ridden expression.

If she could find her own happiness, I felt my heart would become a little lighter as well.

“Forget it all and live your own life now.”

I continued in a calm voice.

“Because I’m living that way too.”

At my words, Charlotte’s expression suddenly went rigid.

She abruptly stood up and turned away from me, distancing herself.

“…Charlotte?”

Even when I called her name, Charlotte didn’t look back.

She simply left a single tear behind and disappeared from the room.

 

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