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There wasn’t much information about Zuwei Academy.

There’s a character called the Saint, who’s basically a lump of darkness, and a dean who’s just dripping with inferiority complex. And every year, they hold a competition—that’s about it.

Naturally, it makes sense that the academy wouldn’t get involved with others, and even if they did, it’d just be a tool to boost up a grown-up Arthur, the darling of their own story.

So, I was curiously watching, but they were just acting like regular people.

I expected at least some eccentric characters.

The meeting wrapped itself up amongst themselves.

I heard the annoying smacking sounds, so I suggested to change it to a crunching noise, and they just ignored it and proceeded.

“I still hear smacking in my ears…”

“That’s just an auditory hallucination.”

Of course, the biggest victim of the smacking sound would be Yui.

She was right next to me, so unlike the other professors who ignored my crunching and smacking, she had to hear it all.

I’m not normally one to make such noises while eating. If someone smacked their lips in front of me, I’d have shoved a fist right into their face, but this time I had no choice; I was too bored.

With nothing to do in this never-ending meeting, I started making those noises out of sheer boredom.

Taking Yui, who was shaking her head beside me, we headed toward the colossal training ground where the competition would take place.

We weren’t heading directly to the training grounds, but rather to the waiting room for the participating professors.

As we made our way to the waiting room…

“Hello.”

There stood Riche.

I was about to just ignore her and walk past.

“Hey, wait! Don’t ignore me…!”

If she hadn’t blocked my way…

“You just came to say the same old things anyway.”

Ever since I turned down her help last time, she’s shown up almost every day to propose one thing or another.

She laid all her negotiation cards on the table. You could even think of it as a donation, it was that large.

The problem was, those cards she thought were generous were completely useless from my standpoint.

And it seemed she had decided not to make the threats she used to throw around, perhaps due to a change of heart.

If she had threatened me again this time, I’d have reincarnated her into another world.

What a shame.

“No. That’s not why I’m here today…”

Even if it were another reason, I really wouldn’t be curious.

You coming to find me would only pique my curiosity if I had something to gain.

I suppose this is why regular behavior matters. Having come to find me, I really don’t have any expectations for what she’s about to say.

“I just… heard there’s a competition today and wanted to cheer you on…”

“What kind of negotiation tactic is that? Are you trying to use some kind of pure and innocent beauty trick?”

If she had only been the carnivorous woman who was constantly pestering me, now she’s experimenting with different variations?

Which one is my preference, you ask?

“It’s nothing like that! I’m really here to cheer for you!”

“Not a chance! Doesn’t work on me! My genius mind has figured it all out!”

“….”

In the end, since I hit the nail on the head, Riche couldn’t say anything.

As I passed by her towards the waiting room, I could hear Luna and Yui comforting her from behind.

*

After waiting in the waiting room, I was taken aback by the training ground before me.

“Oh…”

It’s huge!

The training grounds I had seen until now were large under the banner of sparring, but this place was miles bigger.

A pure white floor—made from who-knows-what—encircled by stands for spectators.

“We will now begin the competition between Jeminal Academy and Zuwei Academy’s professors!”

Someone acting as the host amplified the announcement with a magical tool.

“First, let me explain the competition’s rules!”

The rules for competitions are something every academy student should know.

Established as a half-tradition, any student dreaming to enroll in the academy would know it.

But the reason the host explained the rules was due to changes or additions this time.

In short, the winning condition is to knock the opponent out of the training ground. Conversely, losing means falling out of the training ground.

This came as a proposal from the opponent academy’s dean. Although they claimed it was to showcase various strategies and prolong the match, it seemed to me they just intended to keep the match on the training ground without knocking anyone off.

Another winning condition was if one dean judged that the opponent was unable to fight.

Initially, it was to be judged by the host, but it seems Lucia, like the other side, also proposed a rule to ensure it never ends.

The opposing team likely accepted because they thought it would favor them.

Aside from that, there aren’t many other rules. Obviously, any deceptive skills like black magic are prohibited, and all weapons apart from artifacts and magical tools are permitted and can be used.

That’s all the rules the host has explained.

“Now, let’s introduce the players! First, Luke from Jeminal Academy!”

Upon being called, I ascended the stairs to the top of the training ground.

Luna and Yui had been seated on chairs with the other professors.

It shouldn’t have been possible, but it was since they were connected to me.

“Next, we have Uweber from Zuwei Academy!”

– Screech! Professor, you’re so good-looking!!

– Take me, Professor!!

– Please win for us too!!

As the host called out the opposing professor, unlike my time, the female students screamed to the point of bursting their throats.

Soon after, a handsome young nobleman with golden hair appeared from the opposite stairs.

He scratched his cheek as if embarrassed, but even that looked like a magazine cover, making me feel a little sick.

“Haha… Sorry. It seems our side’s students have caused a bit of a ruckus.”

There appeared to be no other meaning; his apology was sincere.

In reality, cheers have a lot of significance in competitions.

For the athletes, hearing the huge difference in cheers between their own mediocre noise and the other’s deafening screams can sap their motivation before the match even begins. That’s why he apologized.

But I didn’t really mind. The difference in skills between the opponent and me made it hard for cheers to affect the outcome.

After all, soon enough, those cheers would turn into screams and wails.

Crack, I stretched out my hands while grinning.

“The time limit is 30 minutes! Let the match begin!”

– Bam!

With a light spell from the host, they announced the start.

“I’ll learn a thing or two.”

Then, his expression changed completely.

He dropped the kind demeanor and became someone who looked like he could shoot magic at any moment.

Although he appeared that way, he was still a professor, and of course, he’d take this match seriously.

He threw a glass bottle of water from his waist at me with one hand, but before the bottle even got to me, he shot electricity right at it, shattering the bottle and splattering water everywhere.

Showing all he could use.

Honestly, he was right. The rules of the match allowed for any weapon except magical tools, so that bottle was fair game.

Only using electric magic would be an amateur’s tactic. Despite his youthful appearance, he seemed to have vast experience in actual combat.

The aim was likely to splash me with water flowing with electricity, but I simply dodged it with ease.

I could have taken the hit thanks to my skills, but wet clothes would feel uncomfortable.

Seeing that I dodged, the opposing professor said:

“That’s going to hurt a lot if it hits.”

His stance at that moment was poised, as if he aimed to flick his thumb at me.

That position felt oddly familiar.

“Is that a rail—”

My words didn’t finish.

Electricity gathered in his fingertips, and the moment he flicked, an incredibly thick bolt of electricity shot out.

– Boom!

It was indeed faster due to being condensed electricity.

While I couldn’t move faster than electricity, there was no other choice but to take it, so I let it hit me. If that professor had skill comparable to a top-tier A-Rank adventurer, I would have sustained third-degree burns.

“What…?!”

He displayed a shocked expression at how I took the hit without flinching.

Since the training ground was equipped for it, it seemed he used his full power, but to avoid, and yet here I was, standing tall after taking it.

I leaped forward towards that professor.

Of course, he shot electricity to prevent my approach, but since I had just seen that railgun, I was surprisingly unfazed.

Reaching the professor’s face, I said:

“The railgun is the freshest thing I’ve seen so far. Even if it’s plagiarism.”

“Plagiarism…? You call my original technique plagiarism?”

Yep. We have plenty of creative writers in our circle. Many techniques that go beyond that have appeared.

“Did you know? It’s not just your professors who are clueless about character education; students lack it entirely too?”

And so, I’ll have to show them how to conduct character education today.

Actually, I had a lot prepared for this. I even had meetings with Luna and Yui back in the day about how to deal with them.

But seeing a jerk like that ranked second among the elite was enough to change my mind.

Dipping my hand into my inventory, I pulled out the Whip of Love. It looked just like a thick stick made out of wood, a fearsome object that had become a source of terror for past children and students.

And I swung it with all my might toward the professor’s shin.

– Crack!

“Ugh…!”

With a crisp sound, the professor’s knees buckled.

Technically, I should have hit his backside or hamstrings, but we were face-to-face because of the nature of the competition.

“Do you see? This is what the Whip of Love is. Your students are far too rude.”

– Crack!

“Aaah!”

As I hit his thigh, the professor let out a scream.

“When a student misbehaves, you bestow this heartfelt swing upon them. Got it?”

“What nonsensical talk…”

– Crack!

“AAAH!!”

“I said, do you understand, damn it?”

You should answer when being asked; don’t keep talking nonsense.

When parents or teachers wield the Whip of Love, the only thing they can say is, ‘I was wrong.’ That’s the unspoken rule.

But how dare he talk back when I’m holding the Whip of Love?

Looks like he hasn’t received his proper share of discipline. In that case, I’ll have to show off my unique technique, usable only while wielding the Whip of Love.

– Crack! Crack! Crack!

“AAAH!!!”

Swiftly, I struck the professor on the head with the Whip of Love.

Even a person who can bat 100 would feel like they batted 800 at that moment; no matter how slow an arm may be, it moves at lightning speed when using this technique.

Honestly, I suspect the Whip of Love might be an artifact or a magical tool of some sort.

Even senior citizens with hunched backs suddenly feel powered up when wielding the whip, don’t they?

It’s terrifying; a boy doting on his parents would hide all the whips at home just to avoid hitting, but in the end, he would get hit with a clothes hanger.

“Now follow this with what you should say after hitting.”

All of this is for your own good—hitting you tears my heart apart.

I told him just like that, what I knew. People actually do say this.

But while saying it, I also felt that people who say this might be psychopaths.

They attach reasons to their desire to hit someone.

Otherwise, how could I only recall memories of being hit after growing up?

But I’ve decided to become a psychopath and hit him. How great would that be? Being a psychopath means I can hit others without a care and live how I please.

Still, that’s a matter for later.

– Crack!

“Ugh…!”

I delivered another blow to the professor and put the Whip of Love back into my inventory.

“After the whip, you need to comfort them, right? There’s nothing better than a hug for that.”

There’s always a carrot after the stick.

In the case of the Whip of Love, the intense hug serves to convey that while I’m hitting you, it tears my heart apart. For a mother, it’s especially effective to plead while crying.

Conversely, a man’s hug is short and intense.

The stronger I hold, the more my feelings transmit to the other.

With that in mind, I pulled out my caltrops after a long time and laid them behind me.

As I rolled onto them, they embedded into my body.

For an average person, it would have been strange to even squirm in pain, but I merely looked like a human porcupine due to using skills that mitigated all damage.

Next, I took out oil and a match to ignite myself.

Through the fiery haze, I caught a glimpse of the professor’s gaze, now looking at me as though I were insane.

But I didn’t care. Though he looked at me like that now, he’d soon understand my feelings.

As I stepped closer to him,

“Now, just a moment…!”

“Angel☆Fire☆Spike☆Hug.”

I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him in tightly, pouring in every bit of affection I had.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

He screamed in utter convulsion.

Hey, I don’t want to hug a guy either. But I’m doing this for your sake.

With an even tighter grip, I held him close, and somewhere in the distance, I heard the sound of something collapsing.

“HUUUUUUUUUUUAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

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