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After defeating the Iron Golem, there was quite a commotion about who should take its carcass.

But I had already stuffed everything into my inventory, and when I told them if they were unhappy, they could come at me, no one dared to approach and they all awkwardly sneaked away.

Then, we went to inform the busy Count that the missing person request had been resolved.

As promised, we had solved it in a day, so we were entitled to triple the reward.

For reference, the evidence of the resolution was Yui herself.

Yui proved she was a Vampire by demonstrating blood magic and testified about everything that had happened.

And as a reward for helping the Count with the missing person request and the Iron Golem hunt, he arranged for us to have a nice place to stay for a day, so we decided to rest before heading back to the Empire.

After all, it would just be more monster hunting waiting for us anyway.

We went to the sea, which was famous as a resort.

It was a pristine sandy beach where you couldn’t find a single piece of trash in a world without fireworks.

The water was nice and clean, unlike the dirty beaches of Korea.

Since we couldn’t just walk in wearing our dirty, battle-worn armor, we bought some comfy clothes to change into.

I changed quickly and was already playing with the sand.

There were many other people on the beach, and among them, a boy who was having a blast ran up to me and asked.

“Hey big brother! What’s that you made?”

“This is the Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon. I sculpted it based on the real thing.”

“Wow…! That’s awesome!”

“Heh heh. You’ve got an eye for it, kid. You’re going to grow up to be someone big.”

Recognizing the greatness of this creation, he will surely be successful in the future.

“Are you teaching the kid strange things…?”

“Luna, don’t you know better? The greatness of this thing.”

“Uh, um…”

The privilege of experience that only those who have been through it can understand.

A terrifying artifact that can turn a pure girl into something vulgar.

It’s something I need to seal away and not carelessly wield in normal times.

When I looked back, I saw Yui in a frilly dress and Luna wearing commoner’s clothes.

It’s a shame there’s no bikini or swimsuit, but pretty people always look good no matter what they wear.

Luna and Yui weren’t ugly by any means, they were both beautiful.

“Wow… I’m impressed with my insight on slave selection today again.”

“Th-thank you…”

“But more importantly, you came all the way to the sea, why aren’t you getting in the water?”

Why wasn’t I going in the water?

I’m just watching the situation for now.

I left quite a mess behind, but somehow I feel like that guy isn’t going to let this event just slide by.

And before long…

Sure enough.

That guy really showed up.

With bandages wrapped around his body and crutches under each arm.

He had the heroines hanging off him like decorations.

“Extra. You caused quite a ruckus yesterday. But I’m gracious enough to forgive you. You and I have different values as men. Hahaha!”

What’s up with this guy?

Is he here to brag about his heroines?

“Oh. Is that so?”

Then I guess I’ll see if this is something I can forgive.

Jumping to my feet, I approached Tia, not Arthur.

“Hey, Tia.”

“What is it? I don’t particularly want to talk to you.”

“Have you kissed Arthur already?”

When I asked, her eyes blinked rapidly, and she blushed furiously.

“Y-yes?! Wh-what are you talking about?!”

“By your reaction, looks like you haven’t yet.”

I seized Tia’s chin, and then—

<Flip!>

“Huh, oh!?”

I kissed her.

As Tia struggled and pushed against my chest, our lips parted.

“Your first kiss isn’t with Arthur! It’s with me, Luke!!”

“W-what the crazy human…!”

Seeing her about to slap me, I made the first move.

I reached out and grabbed Tia’s chest.

“Ah!!”

“Wait…!”

“Your first chest isn’t with Arthur! It’s with me, Luke!!”

Then I groped her backside too.

“Yikes!!”

“Stop it!!”

“Your first backside isn’t with Arthur! It’s with me, Luke!!”

At that, Tia, on the verge of tears, raised her hand as if to use magic.

But I was quicker, stomping the ground.

“No chance! Shoulder tackle!!”

“Ahh!!”

Who would wait around while she prepared her magic in front of me?

Tia, having fallen on her backside from my shoulder tackle, found Arthur stumbling over trying to intervene.

“What are you doing!?”

“I was just enjoying a taste of the heroine since you came boasting about them.”

Wasn’t that why I brought you along?

Arthur grunted, but with crutches in both hands, he couldn’t do anything.

Honestly, it’s more impressive that the protagonist can move in that state.

Well, I get it if he likes to boast about his heroine.

In a world centered around the protagonist, it’s natural that the protagonist’s heroine is one of the prettiest in the setting.

But nowadays, the trend isn’t just to make the main heroine pretty; even sub-heroines or unapproachable heroines are set up to be stunningly beautiful too.

A common example is “Please, give me your daughter!”

Take Yui, who should have originally been dead, or Luna, who is mentioned nowhere in the story, yet both are no different in appearance from main heroines like Riche or Tia.

And if he came to brag, he shouldn’t be sneaking glances at Luna’s chest.

I’d say he’s far beneath being called a beta male; he’s more of a gamma male.

Looking around, everyone was watching me with disdain.

I bowed dramatically as if I was an orchestra conductor greeting the audience.

“Thank you for the praise.”

Isn’t the best compliment to a gamer “You suck at gaming”?

That type of disdain can be more of an industry award.

“You crazy bastard… if I had my arms, you’d be dead.”

“Now that I look at it, your arms aren’t in good shape. What’s up with that?”

“You made me this way!!”

“Did I?”

I already knew, I was just being cheeky.

In the end, Arthur couldn’t do anything, and he stumbled away with Tia and the heroines in tow, heading towards the sea.

“Luna, remember when you asked why I wasn’t getting in the water? You’ll find out soon.”

—Ahhh!!

Just as I said it, a scream rang out.

We simultaneously turned our gazes towards the source of the scream.

A predictable event, and a clichéd monster.

A Junior Kraken.

A massive octopus monster, about 3 meters, had three women dangling from its tentacle-like limbs.

Those three were, of course, women I knew.

“I figured that would happen, which is why I didn’t go in.”

As this was a sub-event featuring the protagonist and heroines, there’s no way anyone else or I would be targeted.

But I wouldn’t do something foolish like go in knowing something was going to pop out; otherwise, I would have gone in to catch the Vampire without burning the mansion down.

“Luke, do you possess foresight or something?”

“Luna, the author is invincible and the reader is a god.”

“……?”

But if the author is making me possess their character, does that mean the author is also a god?

No clue.

I might as well just check my status until this sub-event is over.

—

[ Information ]

Name: Luke

Gender: Male

Age: 20

Magical Power: 0 / 0

Level: 59

[ Skills ]

Inventory (F)

Superstrength (B)

All Attribute Resistance (A)

[ Stats ]

Strength: 49(+24)

Agility: 10

Intelligence: 0

Stamina: 10

Stat Points: 10

Oh. I remember being level 42 before coming here.

Now that the quest is completed, I’ve gained a noticeable amount.

With the Vampire and Iron Golem defeated, it’s record-breaking growth.

In fact, I was kind of thinking the original armor was hidden away in this place.

I invested all my stat points into strength.

Now my strength is at 59.

Adding in Superstrength, that means I’m at 88.

I have an unbalanced distribution compared to my other stats, but if my stamina is low, I won’t be hit at all. I can just catch monsters without worry.

With my low agility, I can be fast with Luna’s buffs, or just one-shot enemies that would normally take ten hits to kill.

“U-um… Luke?”

“What is it, Yui? I’m busy right now.”

“Those people seem dangerous…”

“Oh really? What do you think, Luna?”

“The monster itself doesn’t seem strong, but something seems off.”

Considering Luna is usually unfazed by most things, her saying that means something amusing might be happening.

I dismissed my status screen to check.

What I saw was…

“That’s really impressive. Just amazing.”

It was utterly pathetic.

Just watching could make someone shake their head in dismay.

A sub-event at the beach typically involves the previously strong heroines being rendered helpless by a blatantly low-level event monster.

Especially the giant octopus; it’s practically a staple.

In the original, Arthur’s gaze faltered as he awkwardly waited while the octopus enjoyed itself before coming to rescue them.

But there are two problems; one is that Arthur is currently a bandaged-up disabled person.

The other is that idiot can’t even think about rescuing them, just passively watching as the heroines are being toyed with by the octopus.

At this rate, a couple of swings of a sword would have ended the event, but it still drags on.

“Let them handle it themselves.”

If they’re fine with it, then who cares?

That octopus isn’t a monster that eats people. Besides, I doubt the heroine and protagonist could die even if they wanted to, so they’ll handle it.

From the looks of it, Stella seems to have already lost her composure.

“Are you not going to catch that? Isn’t that the experience you keep talking about? Don’t you need that this time?”

“Oh, that’s a lowly monster. Even if I catch it, I won’t get much experience.”

It was written in the author’s TMI.

A lowly monster, they said.

Naturally, if one were to unleash a vicious monster in the middle of a beach, it would have been less an event and more a massacre.

The heroines would have been half-eaten and vanished as soon as they appeared.

I didn’t want to help, but watching the joy of the more hateable guy taking over Arthur’s body stirred me up with the urge to mess with him.

I dug into my inventory and pulled out an item.

“Ugh!”

Luna instinctively flinched and stepped back, grimacing at the item I pulled out.

In contrast, Yui, who didn’t know what it was, looked full of curiosity.

“What is that?”

“If you’re curious, it wouldn’t hurt to open it yourself.”

It was a flask I had made back when I was preparing to hunt the War Wolf.

I’d made so many that I still had leftovers.

And my innocent Yui was about to make the same mistake as Luna.

-Pong!

“Hyik…!”

Just like with Luna before, she had no idea and opened it without thinking.

If she had picked up on Luna’s reaction, she might have sensed something was off.

I pulled out another flask.

This one wasn’t from my inventory but from the pouch tied to my waist.

“Ahhh!”

Yui dashed away in fright.

Inside the flask was not a liquid but a creature.

Mr. Basemaster.

Whenever I put it in my pocket, it kept trying to escape, so I had to keep it in a flask.

These creatures are so hardy they can survive without food or water for days.

“Why on earth does Luke carry something like this…?”

“To torment people.”

“What…?”

“Listen closely, Yui. Everyone has their specialty. Even if someone is a total loser in other areas, they can dominate in their own field.”

What I specialize in is, purely, tormenting people.

If I said I enjoy making people miserable, you might scold me about being a horrible person, but what if I were a dark hero?

A dark hero tormenting annoying people or outright villainous scum.

In that case, I’d get praised for my “educational” methods.

“So, are you going to throw it or not?”

Shaking her head vigorously, Yui rejected the idea.

Strong denial means a yes, right?

“Okay, then I will.”

Whipping the flask full of nasty vinegar at Arthur, I threw it.

It smashed against his head, and—

-Wup!!! Uweeeek!!!

For a bonus, I threw another flask with cockroaches in it.

-Aaaaahhh! What the hell is this!!!

Unfortunately for the person possessing Arthur, he must dislike bugs.

“Heh heh heh. Nothing beats torturing the protagonist.”

“……”

“……”

 

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