Volume 4 Chapter 80: “Rough Tongue”
—The awakening came from the sensation of something rough brushing against my cheek.
As I became aware of my rising consciousness, what I felt was the fatigue permeating my entire body. It was as if lead had been pumped instead of blood through my veins, leaving me in a state of sheer lethargy.
When I tried to breathe and opened my mouth, my dry and cracked lips split open, flooding my mouth with the sharp taste of blood. I realized my tongue, parched and tingling, was crawling around in search of the moisture of blood within my completely dry mouth.
My limbs moved sluggishly, and my mind seemed almost feverish, slowing down to a crawl.
I lacked even the strength to force my eyelids open, rolling my heavy eyeballs until, at last, I managed to pry my eyes open.
And then,
“…Is that you?”
The moment my vision colored, I saw the pure ebony of something that wasn’t the color behind my eyelids.
What moved before me breathed the musky air characteristic of animals, continuously licking my cheek as if to comfort the sleeping Subaru.
With its sleek and polished form bathed in glossy black, sharp-yet-adorable reptilian eyes staring at me, and fangs that looked capable of killing me in an instant—it was my beloved dragon, Patrasche, who was licking my cheek with its red tongue out of its mouth.
Noticing that I had awakened, Patrasche stopped licking and sat down as if waiting for my words. Surprisingly nimble for an earth dragon, it was able to fold its knees to sit.
Looking directly at Patrasche, I realized I was leaning against something solid and had thrown my legs over the ground. When I tilted my head to look behind me, I saw the moss-covered stone wall, an unmistakable sight indicating I must be near the entrance of the graveyard.
“I was definitely inside… Why am I outside…?”
Under normal circumstances, I would awaken from the dream castle from within the graveyard.
Of course, if someone had dragged an unconscious Subaru outside while he was unconscious, that would be a different matter. However, in the current “Sanctuary,” only Emilia and Garfiel could enter the graveyard.
The likelihood that it was either of those two who had brought me outside felt utterly unrealistic.
“Then again, I don’t think I dragged myself out here alone, so what on earth…?”
As I tried to continue that line of thought, another voice suddenly interrupted me.
“Hey! Patrasche! Wait…!”
From a distance, a figure, breathless, was running towards us and stumbled as it got closer.
“Hey! Patrasche! If there’s a chance to run away, that would be a big deal for me… Huh?”
Stopping in place with sheer relief at spotting Patrasche was a gray-haired young man—Otto. After taking a breath of relief at Patrasche’s status, he tilted his head upon noticing me right beside it.
“Is that you, Natsuki-san? What on earth are you doing in a place like this?”
“Can’t you tell? I’m moonbathing. What about you? What were you doing out here at this late hour? I might just have to turn you in to Garfiel.”
“I don’t know why I’m the one being assumed to have done something wrong. You are partially responsible for my sweating at this hour, Natsuki-san.”
With that, Subaru tried his best to maintain his usual demeanor and chat with Otto. Otto shrugged his shoulders as if to say “What a bother,” shaking his head dramatically.
“Not connected to you?”
“It was noisy, so I went to check on the dragon stable, and then I found Patrasche making a ruckus. I thought maybe something was up, you know? Maybe it had been cooped up for days and was stressed, so I thought I’d let it out for a light stroll, and then… Boom.”
Clapping his hands for emphasis, Otto glared at Patrasche’s noble profile. But Patrasche remained focused on me, ignoring Otto entirely.
“Totally indifferent to me, huh? That’s fine, I suppose. Anyway, it charged right past me and bolted out of the stable. I was dizzy for a while, but then I panicked, thinking I would be in serious trouble if it got away, which is why I’m here now.”
“So you were relieved that it came to me, huh?”
“Yes, that’s right. By the way, did you give Patrasche any commands?”
“I didn’t have any time for that. I couldn’t even face it except when I went to feed it…”
“If not, who knows? You must have worried it somehow. I mean, it rushed out of there in such a hurry.”
“Mmm…”
Otto’s muttering about worry caught Subaru off guard, his throat tightening as a new thought sprang to mind.
“No way…”
I searched within myself for any evidence, and I quickly found traces of that proof.
The right shoulder of my jacket had faint bite marks and saliva stains. And, the back of my body, covered in dirt, looked like it had been dragged through the ground.
“Patrasche…”
With those words, Patrasche turned its bright eyes toward me.
As I waited in silence for the earth dragon to respond to my question, I suddenly held my breath and asked,
“Did you pull me out of the graveyard?”
Of course, there was no way Patrasche could respond with words. However, as I became aware of the dirt smeared on my body, I glanced at the dragon and noticed several injury-like marks on its glossy black skin.
It was not an easy task to cause wounds on the hard-skinned earth dragon, even with tools. More than that, the wounds looked as if they were born from the inside of its body.
Suddenly, it struck me.
—The graveyard contains a power that repels those unqualified to undergo the “Trials.”
Roswaal’s injuries began from there, after all. If someone without qualification stepped in, the graveyard would bare its fangs towards the intruder, meaning…
“You got hurt just to pull me out…”
“—”
“What on earth compelled you to do something so reckless? I would’ve woken up and come out normally once I was awake and… that’s all it was. There was no need for you to get hurt like that…”
The wounds etched into Patrasche’s skin were sharp enough to reveal the red flesh underneath its black hide, and they bled profusely enough to make me cringe just by looking at them.
And the fact that Patrasche wanted to take me outside at the cost of such injuries—this was, frankly, a futile act.
Not understanding the true meaning behind what Patrasche had done, I lowered my gaze. The earth dragon approached me, pressing its nose against my neck, rubbing its rough texture repeatedly against me.
Words failed between us, and what I thought was a moment of genuine understanding turned out to be one-sided. Throughout various situations, I felt cared for by this being.
“Otto.”
“What is it? If you want an accurate idea of the situation, I can just slip away to avoid interrupting the good feelings here…”
“Please find out why Patrasche tried to help me…”
Otto possessed the “Blessing of the Word Spirit,” allowing him to communicate with different beings like animals and insects. Surely he could also communicate with Patrasche.
What was in Patrasche’s heart, the reason it wanted to drag me out despite the injuries it received—that fundamental answer was what I truly yearned to discover.
However, Otto’s face twisted into a reluctant grimace in response to my request.
“Honestly, I’m not really excited about this, Natsuki-san.”
“Please don’t say that. Just do it for me.”
“Looking at Patrasche’s murmurs now, you were in the graveyard for that ‘Trial’, right? During the daytime and just now, I had inklings that you might possess the qualifications for this trial. If that’s the case, it seems you must’ve failed, right?”
“…Yeah, that’s right.”
The impact of my encounter with the witches had nearly blurred my memories, but during this loop, I hadn’t let anyone know that I had passed the first Trial. I had only told Garfiel as an exception, then entered the graveyard for the second Trial, the witch’s tea party.
The reason for my depression wasn’t solely because of the Trial, but I couldn’t think of a reason to correct Otto’s misunderstanding, so I merely bowed my head, left to answer as the questioner.
Otto sighed deeply, acting as if he could guess why I had done what I did.
“I can make a guess for you, but it doesn’t change the fact that you went and acted foolishly, Natsuki-san. Especially after you were harmed inside, you made your beloved dragon worry about you to this extent. Patrasche must’ve picked up on something and realized something had happened to you, which is why it dashed over here, practically launching me aside. Those injuries… they’re not unrelated, are they?”
“—”
Otto traced the same line of thought I had, arriving at the same conclusion as I had.
Up until that point, we were on the same path. The issue was why Patrasche had gone that far for me in the first place. That was what I wanted Otto to uncover.
“What’s with that look? You can’t possibly take me seriously about this?”
“On the contrary, do I seem like I’m in a mood to joke at a time like this?”
“Even in your battered state, you’ve still got some spirit for terrible jokes, huh? Given the current situation, I would’ve thought hearing a joke might actually lift the mood a bit… Seriously, do you really not get it?”
Otto’s questioning in a low voice pressured me more than I anticipated.
It was as if he looked down on me with the kind of perplexed expression someone gives when they can’t fathom the depths of foolishness. Did I really overlook something grand?
However, as I squirmed, I couldn’t pinpoint what it was, only furrowing my brows in confusion. My anxious feelings caused sweat to bead on my forehead, but no thoughts came to mind.
Otto sighed for the second time and said,
“Natsuki-san, I can assure you, my blessing isn’t omnipotent. Just because I can communicate doesn’t mean it’s translated perfectly. I can understand it clearly, but trying to relay that to someone else runs into nuances of interpretation.”
“—”
“That’s why you’re giving me that look. Fine, but I wonder if it really holds any meaning.”
Despite grumbling about that, Otto reluctantly agreed to fulfill my request.
He walked over to Patrasche, which was still pressing its nose against me, and gently stroked its black back while speaking.
“—”
From Otto’s throat, high-pitched, raspy sounds emerged.
It was incomprehensible human language—output created by the “Blessing of the Word Spirit,” transforming it into a form most suitable for communicating with the earth dragon.
Patrasche lifted its head, also responding with similar sounds to Otto. After a series of exchanges, Otto opened his mouth again, and after several more calls were exchanged, he said,
“I’ve finished, but… wow, it’s really hard to convey it. The way feelings are expressed is inherently different from how humans do it, so how do I explain what I understand to you…”
“Don’t make me wait. Just tell me already.”
“I’m not trying to delay… Ah, this is seriously difficult! I mean, it really involves a very strange kind of consideration to communicate this, you know?”
As Otto scratched his head in frustration, he pondered several times before finally looking up and taking a breath.
“Well, I’ll choose the words that are probably closest to the truth.”
“Oh… What did Patrasche say?”
“Well, um… ‘Don’t make me say such things’, I guess?”
“—Huh?”
I scratched my cheek shyly, my eyes widening at the words Otto had spoken.
I waited, hoping he might say something even more profound, but no further words followed. Otto simply explained to the dumbfounded Subaru,
“Patrasche says, ‘Don’t make me say such things.’ I mean, that sounds about right, I think.”
“Don’t make me say such things… what does that mean…?”
“It means exactly that. Adding my commentary, it’s more like ‘What kind of idiot wouldn’t understand that without you telling them?’”
As my perplexity deepened, Otto raised a finger and prefaced his next words.
“You see, the moment it learned that its partner was in a tight spot, it couldn’t sit still and rushed to help you, disregarding its injuries, staying by your side until you woke up, and was relieved to see you awake and smiling—how anyone would feel towards someone doing the same thing for them doesn’t change whether they’re human or dragon, in my view.”
“Ah—”
“Well, naturally, if it were Patrasche or anyone else in a similar situation, they’d be like ‘Don’t let me say that.’ With that kind of display of concern, shouldn’t you need to be oblivious to miss it? You’re quite the happy fellow, huh?”
Hearing Otto’s frustrated reply, I came to a realization about my own foolishness.
Looking closely at Patrasche, the earth dragon gazed back at me with the same gentle eyes, and sensing my change, it stood up, swishing its long tail.
“—”
As Patrasche pushed its nose against me again, my hand instinctively began to stroke its rough skin.
As I caressed the solid, rock-like texture with my palm, I spoke in a trembling voice.
“So… you do like me?”
“—”
“You care about me, huh? I see.”
It felt as though a heavy burden had been lifted from my chest.
As I spoke, Patrasche neighed softly, then vigorously rubbed its snout against my palm as if to hide its embarrassment.
As the sensation of my skin being scraped made me frown, I opened my mouth to speak.
“Oh, uh…”
“Natsuki-san?”
Suddenly, warm droplets rolled down my cheek.
Tears. Something that I hadn’t consciously recognized rushed forth all at once. I hurriedly wiped my face with my hand, but it was too late to hide it. Otto had seen it.
“You’re crying because you’ve realized a dragon has taken a liking to you, Natsuki-san…”
“It’s different… It’s not like that… I just, well, the timing matched up perfectly, and… Damn it, right when I was feeling uncertain about that, the answer just pops up like…”
Incredibly, the timing of these developments struck me, and I fought to keep from crying.
At the witch’s tea party, I had realized my true feelings—my desire not to die. Just as I wanted to protect those important to me, I wanted to be with them.
And I had vowed to verify whether I was valuable enough to be cherished by those precious to me.
Then suddenly, the unconditional loyalty of Patrasche showed itself.
Before I could take any action, it did this to me—what was I supposed to do?
I had been struggling with my thoughts about what to do next, and Patrasche had carried the answer to me upon waking up.
At the very least, Patrasche viewed me as someone significant enough that upon realizing I was suffering from nightmares, it wished to drag me out, even at the risk of its own injury.
“Didn’t think I’d learn this from you first… Thank you, Patrasche.”
In response to the loyalty directed toward me, I also stroked Patrasche with heartfelt emotions. Enjoying the sensation of its smooth skin beneath my palm, Patrasche stood tall with a straight back. In the end, the gentle swaying of its tail revealing its delight subtly betrayed its mood.
“With our bond reaffirmed, are you okay, Natsuki-san?”
“Yeah, I’m alright, thanks. …What did you mean by okay?”
“I mean your body and mind. The ‘Trial’ you were in was probably exhausting, right? You were crying from loneliness, and I noticed Emilia looked that way too.”
I wanted to retort against his teasing words, but I couldn’t deny the weakness. Instead, I recalled Emilia’s demeanor when Otto lowered his voice.
“It’s not exactly easy. But I believe my trial is probably easier than Emilia’s. Still, you worrying about me… you’re not perhaps falling for me too, are you?”
“Please don’t say anything creepy! What are you saying? Isn’t there a limit to how needy you can get? You’re not planning on asking every person you meet that, are you?”
“Is that so bad? Honestly, I’m standing on the edge of whether I can accept myself, so I’m looking for as many encouraging messages as possible right now.”
“Yeah, yeah, it seems your usual banter is coming back. That’s a relief… I’m worried about you strictly for the sake of our future relationship, so please don’t misinterpret that.”
Otto’s face carried a look of distaste as he responded to my odd predictions.
His phrasing about ‘future relations’ felt overly formal, but for him, it was probably a necessary statement to clarify his standing as a merchant.
“Natsuki-san, associating with you is to maintain a good rapport with Baron Meisars. If problems arise or my own safety becomes jeopardized, I’ll be sure to run away quickly. Just keep that in mind.”
Though it was a callous thing to say, it wasn’t harsh, just an unspoken agreement for both parties. That Otto actually voiced this made me realize his good nature.
“Ah, right. You… no.”
After receiving his realistic statement, I started to nod but then stopped.
Right after hearing his preamble, a sense of discomfort brushed across my chest.
I immediately came to a conclusion, letting out a sigh.
“…What’s that about?”
“Hmm? What are you remembering?”
“Nah, nothing. Just reminded me of something else. Right, yes.”
Nodding profusely in response to Otto’s quizzical expression, I placed my hand on my forehead, gazing towards the sky.
During this cycle of loops originating from the “Sanctuary,” I had teamed up with Otto numerous times. Each time, I’d witnessed something.
Thus, I looked at Otto and said,
“When the situation becomes dangerous for you, you run away… right?”
“Of course. Isn’t that obvious? There’s no reason for me to hold any loyalty towards Natsuki-san or anyone else. It’s a matter of preserving life…”
“You wouldn’t run away.”
“—Huh?”
With an overly casual tone, making it sound so easy to pretend to be a realist, I whispered that to Otto.
And taking note of his wide-eyed surprise, I turned to face him squarely and said.
“You wouldn’t leave me behind, Otto.”
That time when he silently sneaked into Garfiel’s lair for my sake, when he resisted alongside the villagers to protect me from Garfiel’s beastly threats.
Even as he lined up harsh words, I knew he wasn’t cruel.
That’s why,
“Otto. —You’re my friend.”