Chapter 22
“Ugh, enough already…”
The one who came to kill me was trembling and drooling.
“Eww, that’s disgusting.”
If a stranger were to see this, they might think I’d been tortured.
Looking at the pathetic figure of this guy who just left, it made me feel dirty enough to just end him right there.
[Level Up! Check your status!]
“Too sweet~”
Even useless trash is giving their all to donate experience points—does that mean there’s no such thing as non-recyclable trash in this world?
And seriously, what is this writer thinking, allowing people to get experience points from killing?
If I wasn’t a kind and rational intellectual, giving such traits to a serial killer would have led to the empire’s downfall long before a demon god could invade.
“Luke, my lord.”
“Oh. Is it over?”
“Yes. I’ve recorded the location and the client.”
“That’s surprisingly bland.”
Just moments ago, the man I killed was boasting that no matter how much I tortured him, he wouldn’t talk, but he ended up spilling everything in just a few hours, looking like a sadomasochist who couldn’t last a day.
Of course, he would have cracked even faster, but I just wanted to have fun torturing him for a while.
According to the information he spilled, the name of the person targeting me is Dine Berkeley.
He’s a noble from the empire’s baron class, running a small business on the surface while secretly kidnapping people to sell them as slaves—what a scum!
“What will you do now?”
“What do you mean?”
“Are you going to set out right now?”
“No? I’m going to sleep.”
I had stayed up all night because of those jerks, so I was definitely going to get some rest.
According to current labor laws in Korea, the maximum working hours per day is 8 hours.
Since I have already captured the Rhino Horn, the Iron Horn, and now this scum, I’ve surpassed 8 hours, so sleep is a must.
What if monsters attack right now? Then I’ll take a nice nap.
What if demons attack now? I’d still take a nice nap.
What if a demon god attacks? I’d die happily in my sweet dreams.
“…You’re not going to take care of it right away?”
“Why bother? The client probably doesn’t even know the guy’s dead.”
It’s not like they came begging for me to ‘please kill him,’ so why should I give up my precious sleep time?
That’s a violation of labor laws! I’ll report them right away.
“Anyway, I’m sleeping, so don’t disturb me.”
“…Yes.”
*
A person who always keeps their word. That was Luke.
Luna looked at the sleeping Luke beside her as her thoughts raced.
‘…I want to go alone.’
She had no idea who had kidnapped her, and even though she felt resentment, she saw no way to pursue it.
But today something happened.
The perpetrator had come here, spilling out information.
Someone who had massacred her family was hiding somewhere on this land. Who could think rationally under such circumstances?
Luna wanted nothing more than to go and kill Dine Berkeley right now, even if it was dawn.
However, there was one reason stopping her. Luke.
‘If I can’t handle it and get taken hostage…’
She’d die.
Not by Dine Berkeley, but by Luke.
From what Luna had seen of Luke over the past few days, he was someone who acted without hesitation.
If she stormed in alone and couldn’t handle things, and ended up a hostage, she imagined how it would play out.
– If you want to save the hostage, drop your weapon!
– What the hell! You die with us!
And the scene of a sword piercing through both her and Dine Berkeley.
Such images automatically painted themselves in Luna’s mind.
“If it’s you, Luke… no, I’m sure it would be like that.”
Because she didn’t want to be treated like that, Luna managed to keep her reasoning intact.
“Ha…”
Being able to think rationally made those few hours feel like an eternity.
To forget the swirling thoughts in her head, Luna picked up a rag and began cleaning the floor.
She thought that staying busy might help the time pass quickly and help her forget.
She wiped off the blood that had splattered everywhere when she decapitated the assassins.
She cleaned up the blood that had spread and hardened on the floor.
She also wiped off the blood that sprayed onto the walls like a fountain when she beheaded someone.
Once she finished cleaning, having nothing else to do, she lay down next to Luke, forcing herself to sleep.
Hoping time would pass quickly.
*
“Alright, let’s go!”
“…If we do that, we’ll be the ones caught.”
“If we’re caught, they’ll come looking for us first. Isn’t that good?”
“……”
Currently, we were at the entrance leading underground, following the information gained from the assassin.
It was unusually deep in a dark and narrow alleyway, likely to avoid being seen while conducting illegal activities.
If we hadn’t had any information, we probably would have spent days searching these back alleys. It would have been quicker to give up than be bothered by it.
“But seriously, it’s a pity we don’t have any CS gas.”
The enemy is hiding underground. What’s the nature of underground?
No windows, and even if there were, they wouldn’t be ventilated.
It’s completely enclosed, with only one door.
If I could just toss in a canister and shout, ‘Gas! Gas! Gas!’ they’d either faint from the smoke or run out in a panic.
Then, I’d just stand at the entrance, swing my sword a few times, and smoothly take care of them.
“What’s CS gas?”
“A gas that comes out when you throw a bottle.”
“Is it like smoke grenades?”
“More painful than that. It makes you tear up and snotty.”
I haven’t actually tried it, but since it’s supposed to be painful, I assume it is.
“Enough chit-chat. Let’s go in. Kill them quickly, and then let’s get some weapons from Uncle.”
“Killing is a certainty then…”
“If you’re going to kill someone, you have to be prepared to die.”
That’s an excuse; I’m just doing it for the experience points anyway.
I led the way down the stairs.
It was a pitch-black staircase with no lights, making me wonder if anyone really lived down there.
And the stairs seemed endless.
How deep did they want to hide them, to build this place so far down?
I seriously missed escalators and elevators.
After about ten minutes of descending, a steel door came into view, and a lantern hanging next to it cast a weak light.
—Knock, knock.
Knocking on a door that clearly required a password, a square hole opened at my eye level, revealing two eyes.
“Password.”
“I love you~♡”
Soon, the hole closed.
“Huh? Was that not it?”
—Knock, knock.
As I knocked again, the person inside had no choice but to respond.
“Password.”
“Do you know the way?”
Then, the square hole shut tight with irritation.
“Shit! Stop fooling around!”
—Knock, knock.
I knocked one last time.
After a moment, the hole opened again, and as if it were my last chance, I spoke.
“Sigh… password.”
“Your mom.”
—Bang!!!
A fist sized hole appeared in the door as it flew back against the wall.
“Whoa.”
“…That was a bit excessive.”
“What’s the big deal? I’m going to kill them all anyway.”
For the record, the man asking for the password a moment ago was squashed by the door, and though he was out of sight, the trail of blood on the floor made it clear he was either dead or unconscious.
But I like to be certain, so I stepped on the door and jumped a few times to make sure.
“……”
“Okay. Not a peep, so he’s definitely dead.”
Passing through the entrance, a narrow hallway that could barely fit two people appeared, and not far ahead, there was a luxurious wooden door engraved with ornate designs.
Once I opened the door, I found a lavish room that seemed impossible for an underground space.
Across from me, something seated on a chair spoke.
“Ha. Stupid commoners come to die on their own—”
“Whoa crazy! Luna, a pig is talking!”
Is this fantasy!?
There’s a talking pig! My heart swells!
Could it be a highly intelligent orc, but looking at its skin color, it seemed like a pig.
“This bastard… who are you to—?”
“But seriously, who owns this place to dress a pig and keep it? They must have nothing better to do. Pigs should be kept in a pen. Whoever the owner is, I guess they aren’t very bright.”
“Luke, that person is our target, Dine Berkeley…”
“What!? That’s a person!?”
How can something like that be human!?
Is this the fantasy world we live in!?
A pig can become a person!
“Well, if polymorphism is a thing, this pig can turn into a person too.”
“Yes…! Hans!!”
“As my master wishes.”
When the pig squealed ‘oink!’, a man dressed as a butler emerged from the wall.
As soon as he revealed himself, he charged us, and Luna faced him head-on.
*
-Clang!
The sound of swords clashing filled the room as Luna’s sword met Hans’ blade.
“Cough cough. For a slave, you handle a sword quite well, but you’ll never win against Hans!”
Though he usually acted as a butler, he was an assassin trained by the Berkeley family, and he was displaying extraordinary skill.
Unless the match-up was purely unfavorable, there was no way a mere slave would lose in a fair fight.
With each strike, Luna’s body sustained more wounds, and even from the perspective of Dine Berkeley, who had no fighting experience, it was clear that things were turning against Luna.
“Ugh!”
“Hahaha! Fool! You came here to die on your own!”
“Evolution! I’ll evolve and then win!”
“……?”
Suddenly, a voice chimed in from next to him.
Dine, feeling confused, turned to look, only to find Luke casually sitting at the table, watching the fight, munching on popcorn.
“Oh, you’re here now!”
“Dine!!”
“Ah, don’t mind me. Just keep going. Otherwise, she’ll die.”
Luke poked his finger into Dine’s head, emphasizing each word.
All Dine could do was turn pale, wishing for Hans to win.
However, distracted by Dine, the advantage slowly shifted towards Luna, leaving Dine with no choice but to take desperate measures.
“If you don’t help me now, your slave could die. Are you okay with that?”
This was Dine’s plan to get Luke involved, hoping to create an unfavorable situation for Hans, but Luke turned out to be crazier than Dine had anticipated.
“If she dies, she dies. What’s it to me?”
Dying this easily means you can’t survive in this cruel world.
In mere months, an S-Rank Monster, Behemoth, is set to invade the academy, and if you keep fawning over scumbags like these, you’ll definitely be dead by then.
“W-What are you saying! That’s your slave!?”
“Ugh, shut it! Why does this pig have to keep yammering on?”
Luke’s fist struck Dine’s head.
“Ooink!?”
“Finally acting like the pig I know.”
“Dine!!”
Hearing a pig’s squeal made Hans look back at Dine, but the price he paid for being distracted in battle was steep.
Winds whipped around Luna as she swiftly decapitated Hans in one clean stroke.
“Hans! Nooo!!!”
“……?”
The voice crying for Hans wasn’t Dine.
“Do you want me to die?”
“However, I hardly had any popcorn yet, so it’d be boring if it ends now.”
Hans, whom Dine had trusted, was now dead.
At this point, Dine had nothing left to do.
“Then let’s quickly deal with this pig.”
“Wait! I’ll pay you! If you want, I can even give you a prettier slave than her!”
Dine now had nothing but his life to negotiate with.
As long as he survived, he could recover everything—revenge, his butler, his money, everything.
“Oh… look at that. I guess that plebeian isn’t so low after all, considering he’s contemplating my money.”
‘You should’ve done this earlier.’
“Yes! If you spare my life, I will give you everything you desire! Money or slaves—”
“—ha!”
—Puh!
Luke’s fist collided with Dine’s face.
He went flying backward from his chair.
“ORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORAORA!!!!!!!!”
He kept hitting Dine with consecutive blows until Luna yelled for him to stop.
“Luke! Wait a second!”
“What’s wrong? You want to kill him?”
Although the desire to kill was strong, even considering his worthlessness, he was still a noble of the empire. There were potential repercussions if the empire investigated later, so murder had to be avoided.
It seemed like hanging around with Luke would always lead to such situations, and repeating this would likely get them both chased out of not just the empire, but the entire city.
“I have a good idea.”
So, Luna whispered her proposal to Luke.
“Wow… even a demon god might find that a bit too much…”
“Ahem… so what do you think of my plan?”
“It sounds fun!”
