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A toilet with its arms and legs tied behind it crawled on the floor. It looked quite nice, being mercilessly trampled by the two extras it used to hang around and the heroine.

“Looks like you won comfortably.”

Riche, along with Luna and Yui, had sustained no injuries worth mentioning. They must have fought each other with the intent to kill.

Even if they were different on the inside, they’re the protagonists, so can they really win so easily?

“It was a bit tricky. But no matter how strong a weapon you have, if the user is that pitiful, it’s like putting a pearl necklace on a pig’s neck.”

“Their attacking methods were pretty one-dimensional. Maybe because we’ve seen only strange stuff up till now… excluding the tricky light attribute magic, they were easy to handle.”

Well, after all, he was a fool with the ability to learn two attributes, fire and water. There was no way a dramatic change would occur just because he went dark.

“So, what are we going to do with him now? Are we going to kill him like usual?”

“No, it takes time to open a portal anyway.”

I turned to look at the demons. At my gaze, the demons flinched, their shoulders shaking. They probably sensed that the demon they trusted had been easily killed.

But I had no plans to deal with them right now. If I killed even one of them, it would only delay the portal’s opening.

I turned my head back down to the helpless toilet.

“Let’s take care of this one for now.”

This brat with such insolence. Not only is he neglecting his duties, but now he’s also backstabbing me? Just so you know, I have no plans to rehabilitate him.

What kind of rehabilitation is there for someone who betrayed me once? Dying would be a luxury. These kinds of brats will bother others even after they die.

I hoisted the immobilized toilet onto my shoulder.

“Ugh—! Ugh—!”

“Shut up, you bastard!”

-Smack!

“………”

He kept making noise, so I gave his jaw a little therapy with my fist, and he quieted down.

“For now, let’s just step outside for a bit.”

I came to teach him how to open a portal quickly, but it seemed he had already explained everything, so he probably knew. Waiting around would only be boring since the portal didn’t seem like it would open right away.

I should use this extra time efficiently. I looked at the demons and commanded them.

“Hey, finish preparing that portal while we’re gone.”

“Y-Yes, understood!”

*

“Why are you here…?”

“There’s someone here we need for what we’re about to do.”

The women’s dormitory of Zuwei Academy. That was our current location. Of course, we couldn’t just waltz right in.

Unlike Jeminal Academy, this place had security, and we couldn’t exactly move around under royal orders, nor could we explain what we were here to do, so we knocked them all out upon entry.

What kind of insignificant security could stop us? Even if the dean of this place came, they wouldn’t be able to stop us. After entering the women’s dormitory, I knocked on whatever door was available.

-Knock knock.

“Yes~”

A response came from across the door. Soon after, there were footsteps and the door opened. Standing there was an unknown female student. When she met my gaze, confusion flickered in her eyes.

“……Who are you?”

Didn’t they just publish a newspaper saying a new S-Rank Adventurer was born? But then again… who reads boring newspapers, anyway?

“Excuse me. I’m a law-abiding citizen, but do you happen to know where Angela’s room is?”

“Y-Yes…?”

At that moment, her gaze flickered between me and the toilet I was carrying. I had just introduced myself as a law-abiding citizen, so why was she looking at me with such suspicion?

Or perhaps she didn’t know where Angela’s room was? That couldn’t be, though. Angela was probably well-known among the students, being called a saint.

“May I ask what your relationship with Angela is…?”

“It’s a business relationship.”

“……Excuse me?”

Is my relationship with Angela as friends? That’s not it. We’re at a level beyond hatred into loathing territory.

We only meet out of necessity, nothing more, nothing less. Of course, I mostly need things from her.

“U-Um… I’m not sure.”

“Oh really? Then I guess I’ll have to blow up this building…”

“It’s the room at the end of the left hallway on the second floor!”

“I see. Thank you.”

I thought about blowing up the whole building if I couldn’t find someone after asking just once, but I was glad to have found someone who knew.

I said a quick thank you and turned to leave, but I heard a loud ‘bang!’ as the door slammed shut behind me. Was she worried about a mosquito getting in? Anyway, following the directions given to me, I went upstairs to the left hallway on the second floor.

-Knock knock.

“Yes, right now…!”

When the door opened, Angela’s eyes grew wide when she met mine.

“Hey.”

“……You should’ve finished your business this morning. How did you know I was here…!”

Where else would you be? You’d either be in the dormitory or out doing some good deeds. Sure, I inquired about the location since I didn’t know where her room was.

“Hey, hey. Can you lighten your mood? It’s not like I’m here because I wanted to be.”

Did she really think I’d end up here? The original plan was to help Baal open the portal and then kill everyone before heading to the Demon Realm, assuming no one would stab me in the back.

“Let’s get inside for now. How long do you plan to leave a guest standing outside?”

“But you’re not a guest…?”

“Even if I’m not a guest, this one can be a guest, can’t it?”

I turned sideways to make the toilet visible on my shoulder. At that, Angela’s gaze, which had been fixed on me, finally shifted to the toilet.

“Arthur…?”

“If you don’t help me, this guy is going to die, so if that’s fine with you, just go back.”

“……Come on in.”

I knew she’d respond that way. She had that personality of not being able to ignore injustice. There was no way she could just let this pass by.

She moved aside to let us in. Once inside, she locked the door behind her.

“What about tea?”

“This isn’t exactly a situation for that, is it?”

“True.”

I roughly tossed the toilet onto the floor.

“Y-You just tossed a person! What do you think of this individual!?”

“Toilet.”

At my calm tone, Angela’s eyes widened for a moment before returning to normal.

“Right… you were that kind of person. So, what brings you here this time?”

“What else? I obviously came because I need your help.”

I pulled out my sword and sliced off one of the toilet’s arms. Riche gasped in shock as blood gushed from the severed limb, waking the unconscious toilet.

“……?!”

“Aaaaahhhhh?!”

If it were a delicate task like just cutting off fingers, I’d have left it to Luna, but lopping off arms is something I could handle too.

Blood was flowing from the toilet’s arm to the point of excessive bleeding, but that wouldn’t last long. Yui had stopped the bleeding.

“Hey. Stay quiet. Bite on this.”

“Ughh?!”

If he screamed like that, no matter how well soundproofed the room was, it would be heard in the next room. That’s not acceptable, so I shoved the severed arm into his mouth.

“W-What are you doing?!”

Angela exclaimed, startled, as she rushed forward to heal the toilet. But she couldn’t heal it; I was blocking her from taking the severed arm.

“Step aside! If you don’t heal him quickly…!”

“Heal him.”

“You’ll have to give me the arm to heal!”

“What are you talking about? I’m saying heal him as he is.”

Understanding what I was saying, Angela’s eyes widened.

“Do you refuse? If you do, he dies.”

I didn’t care whether he lived or died. After all, I was planning to take care of the Demon God anyway, so what necessity did I have to keep him alive?

“Uugh…!”

As I said before, it was either live this way or die here. After a brief moment of contemplating her choices, Angela immediately began treating the toilet’s arm.

Since the treatment was more about covering the cut rather than reattaching the arm, the treated toilet ended up looking like it had never had one arm since birth.

Of course, while this toilet could live like this, it wouldn’t qualify as living, but I suppose Angela might think living is better than dying.

In other words, bringing someone back to life is up to the person saving them.

Thanks to that, the toilet avoided death, but it was now no longer an arm and could not be considered one. There was nothing to be found below the shoulder.

Once the treatment was done, perhaps the pain eased a bit, as it glared at me with bloodshot eyes.

“Untie me, you bastard! If only you’re gone!! If only you’re gone!!”

“See?”

When I showed that to Angela, she asked.

“……What on earth happened?”

“Do you know what he was planning to do?”

“I don’t know what’s been going on between Luke and Arthur, but everyone can make mistakes, can’t they?”

“Really? Are you able to embrace everything he’s done?”

Shall we test how broad your embrace really is?

“This bastard was trying to kill us collaborating with Demons and Minions.”

“……Huh?”

“That’s not all. He was trying to open a portal leading to the Demon Realm with the help of Demons down below the Empire.”

I was just about to do the same until a moment ago, but I actually intended to conclude what I was about to start instead of leaving it hanging.

“If that opens, what’s supposed to happen? Demons will flood out of the portal, and all the civilians will die.”

“……”

See? Now you’ve got nothing to say, right? Even a lawyer couldn’t defend this. With Angela lost in thought, I nonchalantly sliced off the other arm.

“Uhhh!!”

“Hey, instead of screaming, you should bow down to me.”

If he became a complete cripple, his heroines would support him for sure. If he had raised his favorability high enough to warrant that kind of response?

Tia is part of the Marquis House, so that’s actually a good thing, isn’t it? You’ll have a beautiful wife taking care of you without working!

With Angela having given up on defending him, she immediately began to heal again. I shifted my position and took the liberty of cutting off a leg this time.

“Ughhhhaaahhh!!!”

“Oh, should I have looked for a wheelchair? Because soon enough, you’ll be needing one.”

I didn’t care.

-Crack.

“Ughhhhhhh!!!!”

Thirty minutes later, I had roughly tied up the toilet with some cloth. The toilet had fainted from the pain of having all its limbs severed and couldn’t make a sound.

“Now we’re done here. I’m really going to go now.”

“……I hope we won’t need to meet again.”

After leaving Angela’s room, we moved to deliver this ‘gift’ to the women’s dormitory of Jeminal Academy.

Standing at the entrance of the dormitory, I contemplated in front of whose room I should leave it, and decided on Tia’s, simply because I anticipated a better reaction from her than from Stella.

This time, we didn’t need to ask anyone for directions to Tia’s room. Riche knew where it was.

-Knock knock.

I lost track of how many times I’ve knocked today.

“Who is it?”

A voice came from beyond the door. It sounded familiar, so it seemed we had found the right place.

“Dong-hwang-cha!”

I placed the toilet, wrapped in cloth, beneath the door and quickly dashed out of the dormitory before Tia could come out. As soon as I exited the dormitory building—

-Kyaaaah?!

A scream erupted from within the dormitory.

“I guess she really liked the gift. She was so happy she screamed.”

“……”

*

“Hehe. We’re almost done!”

As we abandoned the toilet and returned to the underground sewer, a Minion reported back to us.

But I could tell exactly what was going through this guy’s mind from his expression. He was probably thinking something along the lines of, ‘Once the portal opens, you’re all done for.’

‘Fools.’

They didn’t even realize that what they were doing would lead to their own destruction, happily working away at it.

Not long after, the magic circle blazed ominously in a great red light. Soon, the magic circle lost its glow.

And above it, space tore open. The sound was reminiscent of thunder and lightning, causing Yui to flinch and hide behind me.

In an instant, a portal had appeared. What was visible beyond the torn space was nothing but a red background. Until we entered, we couldn’t know for sure what lay beyond.

But… something felt off.

“……?”

The Minions who had been chattering beside me were now in a state of panic. It wasn’t just the Minion beside me; all the Minions in the vicinity were similarly flustered.

“What’s going on?”

“Lu, Luke? Is it all over…?”

“No, normally, when the portal opens, Demons should pour out from inside, right?”

The Minions had firmly believed that Demons would come pouring out to help them as soon as the portal opened and now stood frozen in surprise at the unexpected turn of events.

So,

-Crack!

I took that opportunity to kill them all. I had already planned to kill them all once the portal opened, so it was easy to take care of them all before they got a chance to fight back.

[ Level Up! Check your status! ]

[ Level Up! Check your status! ]

[ Level Up! Checking status… ]

“Luke, what are we going to do now?”

“What else? It’s a bit unsettling, but since we’ve come this far, we can’t just leave, so we have to go in.”

It wouldn’t do to leave the portal open like this. After all, we came here to enter, so there’s no reason not to go in.

“Eh…? That place…?”

“If you don’t want to go, you don’t have to.”

“Then, I, I won’t go…”

“In that case, you’ll be experience points.”

“I-I’m going!”

I leaped into the portal first, followed closely by Luna, Riche, and Yui in order.

 

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