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“There was a bit of an unpleasant incident at the end, but still, the Haunted House was super fun!”

Yeonhwa tried to drag me along like a water ghost with the logic that she was surprised too, so she must be a coward as well. But, that was me being startled by Yeonhwa, and logically, we were outside the Haunted House, so that made her a no-count.

And, come on, that’s totally cheating, right? Single-handedly putting all the blame on me and calling me a chicken seemed pretty unfair.

Yeonhwa was genuinely scared without any tricks up her sleeve, while I just got startled by Yeonhwa, who I didn’t even know was at the end.

That said, being scared doesn’t mean I’m immune to surprise… but, hey, if we’re going down that road, there were plenty of other scaredy-cats to point fingers at.

Maybe they knew this too, since nobody else called me a coward based on Yeonhwa’s logic. In the end, Yeonhwa was the only one left being called a coward.

She whined about it being unfair but, what can you do? It’s just that she’s genuinely a big scaredy-cat.

For her mental health, I hoped she would eventually accept that she has a fear. It’s totally normal to be scared sometimes. I mean, not everyone can be a stoic all the time.

Just look at me, I’m pretty much a mess inside.

…Actually, thinking back, I’m not really sure if I was a mess or not. At least before this body, I could confidently say I was a mess.

I was only ever looking to con people, or play mind games to use them like puppets.

But now that I’m in this body, I can’t be sure if I’m still that kind of person.

Of course, it’s not like I suddenly become a saint or anything. Even after my body and gender switched, I’m still me.

I still enjoy using others, still find joy in other people’s pain, and still break the law whenever nobody’s watching.

But if you ask me if I’m still ‘me’ now, well, I honestly don’t know what to say.

I’ve made true friends for the first time in a genuine way and can find joy in hanging out with others.

In my previous life, I wouldn’t even dream of such a thing, let alone explore the thought—it’d just make me shudder in disgust.

But now I… enjoy that stuff. It’s almost like I’m on the verge of becoming a changed person.

It was a remarkable change, but also quite natural.

Changing bodies meant I must have also changed my brain, which is a pretty straightforward process.

And when the brain changes, a typical person is bound to change as well.

There can’t be consciousness without a brain, but a brain can exist without consciousness. So, the brain is a prerequisite for consciousness.

If a brain gets even slightly damaged or altered, intelligence can plummet, or it can lose its intelligence altogether, or spawn another self unknowingly, or even start seeing things that aren’t real.

If the whole brain has changed, then not changing at all would be the weirdest thing.

That said, it doesn’t mean I’ve become a completely different person.

All the information about my previous ‘me’ is still there, and the way ‘I’ think hasn’t changed completely either, which means I can still say I’m ‘me’.

And there’s also the existence of the soul.

Maybe I’ve possessed a body with a brain structure pretty similar to mine, but thinking that way could go on forever, so I stopped myself there.

How did I end up pondering so deeply like this? Oh right, scaredy-cat.

So, in conclusion, that’s it. Innate nature does exist. And Yeonhwa is just naturally a coward from birth.

…But for someone like that, she’s surprisingly brave when surprised or in a pinch, though I think that’s just her swimming in adrenaline and forgetting her fears.

I sometimes use that method to erase my fears too.

“Being scared isn’t a bad thing, Yeonhwa. Scared people can point out things that fearless folks overlook!”

While riding the carousel, I started trying to convince Yeonhwa that being a coward isn’t a bad thing.

At first, she responded with a grumpy “Don’t tease me!”

But after about four minutes of praising cowards, maybe she changed her mind and thought, “Maybe being a coward isn’t so bad!” and regained some positivity.

“So really, don’t stress over being called a coward. We’re not trying to seriously criticize you, and we’ve seen you muster up courage plenty of times!”

“Right, Yeonhwa. You shine when it truly matters.”

“Yeah, yeah. If I were really a coward, I’d be hiding behind the kids when danger hits, not fighting…”

As her closer friends sided with her, Yeonhwa quickly regained her usual spirit and dragged us all over the place.

Bumper cars, the zoo, the botanical garden, and more.

So, we laughed and spent time joyfully until suddenly it was dinner time.

We tried to swipe dinner off Minho’s wallet, but sadly, this meal was on Lapiz, who insisted on paying for everything.

Seeing Minho smiling and buttering up Lapiz like a benefactor made me want to gag, but I held it in, thinking that Minho has to eat too.

Plus, maybe because I was hanging out with the kids, I felt my mood lighten, and I didn’t want to be hard on Minho anymore.

Lapiz wouldn’t bat an eye at how much she spent, so we enjoyed dinner at the restaurant inside the amusement park.

“It’s about time to head home, but… it feels like a waste to go now. We haven’t ridden everything yet… oh! Right, there’s the Ferris wheel!”

While eating, Yeonhwa pondered what to ride last and suggested the Ferris wheel.

There wasn’t really a reason to refuse, so we naturally decided the final ride would be the Ferris wheel.

The process to get to that decision felt awkwardly strange, but I just thought it was my mistake.

That was until we reached the Ferris wheel and the kids immediately split into pairs as if they had pre-planned it. Jinhyeon and Yeonhwa. Lucia and Seolhwa. Ageha and Alice. And then Lapiz.

Lapiz originally planned to ride with Ageha but, after reading the ride’s safety instructions, she suddenly looked gloomy and declared she’d ride alone.

“Did you guys… plan this ahead?”

Looking at the kids with a bit of betrayal in my expression, Yeonhwa awkwardly smiled and explained to me.

“…It’s just that you two have been a bit awkward lately. So I thought this would be a good chance for you two to say everything you want to say!”

Oh, so that’s why.

“You came all the way to the amusement park just for that?”

“Not just for that, but it is the biggest reason…”

After hearing Jinhyeon’s response, I wiped my face, feeling like I just got completely played.

If it had been at the beginning of the term, I might’ve suspected their motive, but now I didn’t doubt it.

Looks like I’ve really gone easy on them.

“Fine, fine… If that’s the case, I guess there’s no choice but to go along.”

Since I was going to ride anyway, I claimed I would go first and pulled Minho’s wrist, yanking him onto the Ferris wheel.

Facing Minho with the dazzling, brightly lit amusement park scenery beside us.

After more than ten days of deliberately ignoring him, I finally confronted him properly.

“I didn’t set this up.”

As soon as Minho opened his mouth, it was to make an excuse. Seeing him still apologize felt somewhat pathetic, but it was probably me who was wrong.

I hadn’t properly felt sorry in my life before.

“Whether you set this up or the others did doesn’t matter. It’s all the same, right?”

“That’s… true. So, are you still… not over it?”

Minho cautiously asked if I was still angry. If he had to ask if I was still mad…

“Yeah. I’m still mad, and I will be until you really change.”

I was still angry. And I’d stay angry until he truly changed.

“…I thought about what you said for a long time. About who I am and what I should do. Then I realized.”

“Realized what?”

“That I did something horribly severe.”

I didn’t push him to explain what that severe act was. Just looking at his expression, he was clearly filled with regret.

“You know it well.”

“…I’m really sorry.”

This time, he meant it. I could feel his sincerity through his words.

“If you’re going to apologize, don’t do it to me, do it directly to the others. You owe them an apology. I mean, if you had just asked me, I would have helped you. What did you think I was—so untrustworthy?”

Feeling somewhat relieved, I scolded him for not believing me enough to try cheats like that.

“To be honest… yeah.”

“Isn’t that being too honest?”

His overly honest reply made me a bit hurt, and when I retorted, he responded.

“I can’t keep deceiving you. Besides, if I did, you’d just call me out on it anyway.”

“You know it well.”

He looked at me with a bit of exhaustion and asked, as if he had made some kind of resolution.

“Then… is it alright now?”

On Minho’s question of whether we could go back to being comfortable with each other like before, I thought for a moment and answered.

“Yeah.”

Even if we are on opposing sides, we are in the same situation.

To tell him that I was okay now, I extended my fist.

“From now on, just ask me if you need something. I might be a bit secretive… but I’ll help you with just about anything.”

If he were to ask me about my affiliations, that would be awkward, but I conveyed a heartfelt lie that I’m on his side.

 

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