Volume 3 Chapter 28: “Backward Ambition”
“`html
“I see, so the souvenir is this mountain of Ringa, huh?”
Felix pierced a fork into the mountain of cut red fruits, bringing it to his mouth with a mischievous and sultry smile.
“Well, I handed over most of it to the kitchen, but I made sure to save some for tasting. That aside, stop licking your lips while casting sidelong glances. It’s giving me chills.”
Subaru grimaced at Felix’s attitude and waved his hand, settling down on the bed allocated in the guest room while taking a deep breath.
The time was just before evening’s snack time, and the Ringa had been brought in for that purpose. It was prepared by Rem, who had returned with Subaru from sightseeing in the Royal Capital. Now she was supposed to change in her designated room and then meet up with Subaru in his room.
Planning to eat the Ringa while discussing today’s results and future plans—
“It seems there was a boy trapped in the room before us. It’s true the door wasn’t locked, but isn’t that rather rude for a knight?”
“It’s okay! It’s just proof that Felix-chan trusts me. I couldn’t possibly show this lazy side to Crusch-sama, after all.”
As he said this, Felix jumped onto Subaru’s side, making the soft bed cushion his impact, and rolled over, looking up at Subaru at an angle of ninety degrees.
“Did your heart just skip a beat?”
“It did. But it’s nothing to get excited over; I have no particular interests in that direction. My preferences are completely normal—only for girls.”
No matter how cute he looked, there was no way that could cross the gender barrier.
Subaru sighed at Felix, who was reacting as if shocked, and continued, “Honestly, I can’t think of any reason for you to open your heart to me. I don’t recall us being particularly close or anything. Are you, like, emitting some dangerous pheromones?”
“Oh, it’s simple. Because Subaru-kun is definitely weaker than me, you see. Being weak makes me feel safe.”
While resting his chin on the bed, Felix casually said that while looking up at Subaru, who momentarily lost his words.
“You have a terrible personality.”
“Oh ho, I thought you’d be angrier than that, nya.”
“The truth is the truth. I won’t get all worked up over it.”
It had been drilled into him countless times that he was weak.
Since coming to this alternate world, Subaru had been beaten down by his own powerlessness many times. If that day looking at the annoying knight in the training yard was his peak humiliation, getting knocked down by Wilhelm here at the Karsten House was probably at the most frequent.
Arguing fervently about his weaknesses would be foolish. Before coming to this world, he might have fantasized about, “Hey, I’m working out! I might actually do well!” but being exposed to the broad world made him realize just how naive he was.
So, what concerned Subaru was conversely,
“What about you saying I’m weak? I mean, as a knight, you should be training, right?”
“Hmm, Felix-chan? My sword skills are absolutely terrible. The sword I carry is just something my parents insisted I hold, and if I swing it, I’m just going to be overwhelmed by the weight.”
Subaru couldn’t help but raise an eyebrow at Felix flapping his legs cheerfully while saying that.
While feeling a sense of freshness at Felix’s straightforward acceptance of his weaknesses, there was also a hint of suspicion at how he didn’t seem to think of them as weaknesses at all.
Perhaps that inner sense showed on his face. Felix looked sideways at Subaru and, prolonging his words, continued, “But, you know, my good points aren’t in that area. So I don’t care at all if I’m weak as a knight.”
“Well, if you’re content with that, then that’s fine by me. –It’s quite alright.”
Perhaps it was because he had solid ground to lean on, Felix’s words were overflowing with confidence, making Subaru feel uncomfortable enough to avert his gaze.
Suddenly, Felix turned around on the bed, positioned himself behind Subaru, and extended his hands onto Subaru’s shoulders—settling in a shoulder massage pose.
The sensation of his fingers brushing through Subaru’s hair was ticklish, causing Subaru to shrug, but he soon felt warmth tracing down from where Felix touched his shoulders.
The flow of water mana emitted from Felix’s palms began to circulate throughout Subaru’s body. He perceived a far more potent energy flow than mere blood circulation and closed his eyes, surrendering himself to the sensation.
“Slowly, steadily, gently. Oh, look, I found split ends. You’re surprisingly troubled, huh, Subaru-kun?”
“Could you stop chatting while working? This sensation of mana swirling within me is honestly uncomfortable. If I’m not careful, I’ll start feeling dizzy. It’s tough.”
Subaru recalled the discomfort he felt when he used to wear his father’s favorite magnetic necklace for blood circulation.
The healing action involving water mana—it sounds cool and gentle on the surface, but experiencing it firsthand makes it abundantly clear it isn’t an easy path.
It was only natural, considering Subaru’s physical condition.
His physical ailments were due to damage to the gate, which was the entry and exit point for mana. Forcing the leftover dregs through a gate that had been depleted was the root cause.
Felix’s treatment involved using water magic to repair the damage to the gate while expelling the congealed dregs of mana from his body.
“So basically, it’s like plugging the holes in a hose that’s not letting water flow well while pushing out the mold and garbage that’s accumulated inside, right?”
“I don’t quite get what you’re saying, but it feels like you’re using an unpleasant analogy, nya?”
“It’s self-deprecating humor, don’t worry about it. Ugh, this is nauseating.”
He turned his neck, complaining to Felix behind him about his worsening feelings.
It had been three days since staying at Crusch’s residence—so it was his third day undergoing Felix’s treatments. He believed he was getting somewhat accustomed to it.
On the first day, the rising nausea had been overwhelming, making him immediately renounce his efforts.
“Well, I suppose it was understandable on the first day. Plus, I went straight for the worst part, and not having any stamina at that was influencing it too.”
“You’re really good at hitting the spots people don’t want to talk about, you know that?”
Though Felix shouldn’t have seen his expression, he perfectly read Subaru’s thoughts just from the slight agitation. Without hesitation, he waded into the emotional landmine.
With a forced smile to deflect, Subaru tried his utmost not to touch upon any metaphorical scabs, but Felix seemed to mock his reluctance, saying, “So, are you thinking of getting back at me? Training under old man Wilhelm ain’t unrelated to that, huh?”
“Could you not poke at such a sensitive area for me? Can you understand my feelings in this case!?”
“I don’t not understand! Felix-chan also had a time when I wanted to be strong, you know? –Not that I’m seeking any reckless adventures now, though.”
Ignoring the implications towards his own situation, Felix delivered his lines in a tone that betrayed no sympathy.
Every time Subaru remarked about his own lack of martial prowess, he also reminded himself of the overflowing talents he possessed elsewhere.
There were many aspects in the first half where Subaru could empathize. However, he felt he couldn’t relate to the latter half enough to mock himself. Unlike Felix, he found nothing of particular worth in him.
Pride, guts, the feelings directed towards her—he believed he had persisted unwaveringly in such virtues.
“You shouldn’t think too negatively about revenge, you know? I don’t want to say this, but… if there’s a next time, you might die, you know?”
“…I know that much myself.”
Subaru averted his gaze sullenly and muttered in response from inside his mouth.
In the clash with Julius earlier, Subaru had been crushed so thoroughly he couldn’t express it in words. Moreover, he understood that even while enduring such punishment, he was granted leniency by his opponent.
Otherwise, there would be no explanation as to why he hadn’t received even a single deadly wound despite being struck so many times.
A desperate valley existed between him and Julius.
Accepting that, Subaru anymore sought guidance from Wilhelm. He didn’t entertain the delusion that he could become overwhelmingly stronger within a few days of training. He merely thought,
“Wouldn’t it be better if I let myself sink into laziness? I’ve gone through various challenges and my body is in dire straits, and I shouldn’t be expected to contribute much. No one could blame me for taking it easy, so isn’t that a win?”
Before Subaru could even offer his excuses, Felix quickly threw more words at him.
Although the way he expressed himself made it seem like he lacked empathy, the spirit of what he said felt strangely pleasant to Subaru at that moment.
However—
“—Felix-sama. Please do not lead Subaru-kun astray too much.”
A quiet voice resonated through the room, prompting a slight stir of impatience in Subaru.
Behind him on the bed—just as he sat, Rem leaned against the door, her blue hair swaying gently. She must have returned to the guest room to change, but her attire hadn’t changed since descending to the lower district of the Royal Capital.
Becoming aware of Subaru’s puzzled gaze, Rem lightly pinched the edge of her skirt.
“I’m currently changing from my outing maid outfit to a visiting maid outfit.”
“O-Oh, right. Rem always understands my feelings.”
“Yes, I want to always be a fresh Rem in front of Subaru-kun.”
“That’s nice and all, but with that phrasing, I might imagine fish instead!”
“Thank you for your preparation. Subaru-kun was in a difficult position due to Felix’s treatment. However, please refrain from misleading him unnecessarily.”
“Misleading? Felix-chan is just being diligent in looking out for Subaru-kun.”
With a devilish grin, Felix pressed his arms forward and snuggled against Subaru’s side.
His soft gestures and the distinctly firm masculine feel against Subaru’s back prompted a protest from Subaru, saying, “Hey now!” but Felix interjected, sliding his palms over Subaru’s chin and chest.
“Gently enveloping warmth spreading all over your body… if you think that comes from Felix-chan’s heartfelt kindness, falling into it doesn’t sound too bad, does it?”
The whisper in his ear accompanied an exhale, caressing Subaru’s earlobe.
Knowing that Felix was a boy, Subaru somehow couldn’t respond actively despite recognizing the fact. His thoughts became slightly sluggish, leaving him unable to break free from the embrace.
But—
“Felix-sama—”
“Guh!”
“Please refrain from this playful foolishness. It may not remain a joke.”
A jolt returned Subaru’s sluggish mind back to him.
He abruptly regained his senses, realizing that a white fabric was pressing against his face. As he squinted, he recognized it as an apron, leading to the conclusion that Rem had been hugging him with his head cradled.
“Hey, Rem. This is a bit too forward in front of others…”
“Please remain quiet for now, Subaru-kun. —Felix-sama?”
Ignoring Subaru’s attempt at casual embarrassment, Rem tightened her embrace around him and, with a frozen emotional tone accustomed for visitors, called Felix’s name again.
Hearing that, Felix let out a small, drawn-out breath. “I see,” he murmured. “Rem-chan can use water-based magic to some extent. Well, in that case, there’s a possibility you might grasp what Felix-chan is trying to convey.”
Speaking as if resigned to being uncovered, Felix then rested his chin on Subaru’s shoulder even tighter, hugging him more closely.
“Hey, Felix. Even now, when being hugged by a boy, I really don’t feel any kind of excitement, quite the opposite really… Uh, Rem, Rem-san? While it’s nice having my head enveloped in warmth, your strength is a bit too excessive… I mean, not just strong, but too strong…! Gyaaaah!!”
“Oh, Subaru-kun, I’m so sorry. It’s just that Felix-sama refuses to let go… if someone else were to take you away, then I’d be tempted to destroy it instead…”
“No way, is this like a Yandere Cinderella!?”
As his skull began to creak under the pressure, Subaru wriggled free from the grip of both Rem and Felix. Cautiously, he cast a suspicious glance from the corner of the room, only for Rem to shake her head lightly at him in response.
“Subaru-kun, how pitiful… You must have gone through some terrifying experiences.”
“Your last comment hit me the hardest! Is it just me or is there a little too much shading in the way my eyes are drawn!?”
Subaru’s protests went ignored as Rem and Felix exchanged glances, with Rem squinting slightly and Felix awkwardly running his fingers through his chestnut-colored hair.
“While I completely understand Rem-chan’s anger, Felix-chan isn’t doing it out of malice either. There’s a slight bit of concern for Subaru-kun in all of this.”
“What if there are other motives?”
“The rest of it is simply to satisfy Felix-chan’s desire to be friends… and everything aside from that is simply for Crusch-sama, of course?”
With no hint of regret on his face, Felix tilted his head, presenting the question to Rem.
“Isn’t that only natural for a servant? Or do you mean, Rem-chan is different?”
“I certainly wouldn’t differ. So Felix-sama should already be aware of Rem’s answer.”
Rem shook her head at what seemed to be a test. Then, she locked eyes with Felix, and in that moment, it was clear Felix saw something within her gaze. As if surrendering, he raised both his palms defensively.
“Understood. Alrighty then, I’ll hold back on the brainwashing during treatment.”
“From now on, Rem will accompany Subaru-kun during treatments.”
“Oh dear, how distrustful! But that’s absolutely fine.”
Moving aside, Rem stepped in front of Subaru as if to protect him from Felix’s gaze. Felix smiled at her blatant caution and stretched up to meet Subaru’s gaze, who was still silently processing everything.
“So that’s how it is, having received Rem-chan’s scolding, we’ll call it a day. Next time, let’s have a meeting in a place that’s not so obvious, okay?”
“Meeting? I certainly don’t have any awareness of that! Also, didn’t you mention brainwashing just earlier!? I don’t want to meet with someone who speaks of such dangerous stuff alone!”
“Aye aye, the enticing seduction.”
“Don’t say things that sound like you’ve figured me out!?”
With gestures of agreement, Felix arose from the bed, stretching his body as he headed toward the door. Just before he left, he glanced back and said,
“Rem-chan.”
“Yes?”
“While you’d find it hard to believe, I just want to say this honestly… what I did for the sake of Subaru-kun wasn’t entirely untrue.”
He threw that confession towards Rem, not Subaru.
The expression she wore, something Subaru could not see but only witness through Rem’s back, was unknown. However,
“—I understand.”
Rem’s succinct reply discreetly contained a hint of hesitation, which piqued Subaru’s curiosity.
“So that’s settled, huh? Then, goodbye.”
With those final farewell words, Felix exited the room with confidence.
That said, around dinnertime, there would come a time to gather at the same dining table, so the image of ‘parting’ felt somewhat out of place.
As Subaru piqued the musings within his mind about the unnecessary things, Rem turned to him, calling out, “Subaru-kun.”
“Oh, right. It feels like… somehow, I got saved?”
“Who can say? Felix-sama doesn’t appear to harbor any malice towards Subaru-kun, and about what just transpired… while I don’t know the true intention behind it.”
Feeling somewhat uneasy without a clear understanding of what had just happened, Subaru glanced at Rem, who seemed a little reticent in her comments, creating an uncomfortable dissonance, prompting him to frown.
“So, ultimately, what was I just dealing with?”
“Just now, you were receiving Felix-sama’s treatment while having all your water mana interfered with due to his actions, right?”
“I can’t say for certain, but that sounds right? It’s true that, much like soaking in lukewarm water, I felt intensely relaxed in a ‘vivacious joy’ kind of way. Though I guess being overly immersed might also count as a risk of bathing.”
“Interacting with another’s mana circulating within your body entails, to some degree, accepting that person inside you. Therefore, you were in a state where Felix-sama’s intentions were exceptionally easy to absorb.”
“The way you said that sounds downright bad, right!?”
As he spun around and frantically checked his own body, Subaru began to stand up, waving his limbs to clarify if anything felt odd.
“Am I alright? Is anything on me weird? I don’t feel like I’ve become any more feminine, or do I talk like a cat character or something!?”
“Everything is alright, so please relax. You’re distinctly the same as always, Subaru-kun.”
“Really? For real? No kidding?”
“Correct. Trust me, your loyal Rem has been keeping an eye on you all this time.”
Subaru had a feeling that Rem had just pronounced a slightly uncomfortable remark but chose to ignore it, feeling a wave of relief wash over him. After a moment, he nodded slightly, taking a breath and saying, “Well then, let’s go on with our daily routine until dinner. Teacher Rem, if you please.”
Saying so, Subaru faced the desk set up in a corner of the room. There lay a notepad brought from the mansion, stacked with several black-spined books. These were his study materials and practice notebooks. Hence,
“I never get used to being called that, no matter how many times.”
“Given that you’re being taught, it’s certainly appropriate for that position, right? Unless you want to stop, what will it be, teacher?”
“No! Please stick with it as is! It’s my own unique way of being called by Rem! You mustn’t tell anyone else!”
“If you push this hard, I might struggle with unexpectedly high performance! I won’t lose…!”
Subaru unleashed some weird spite and confronted the desk fiercely.
Standing behind him, Rem bore gentle feelings intertwined with conflicting emotions reflected brightly in her eyes, directed quietly at Subaru.
As Subaru earnestly devoted himself to studying, she gazed at him with a glimmer of compassion.
“—Teacher, I’m not really getting this part.”
“Oh dear, Subaru-kun, you really are something, aren’t you? You’re utterly helpless without me. Feel free to show some appreciation for that action every now and then, okay?”
The moment those feelings were triggered, they dissipated as quickly as they formed.
***
–And thus, time in the Karsten House for Natsuki Subaru passed in this manner.
Mornings were spent getting beaten down by Wilhelm, afternoons were filled exploring the Royal Capital accompanied by Rem, and evenings involved receiving treatments from Felix followed by learning to write under Rem’s supervision.
It was a wholesome, satisfyingly productive daily life that was anything but boring.
Occasionally, there were instances of brief conversations with Crusch during her free moments, but they had yet to have a proper chat. After all, the mansion was continuously filled with guests, and Crusch was often required for answering them, leaving her little time for leisure.
Regardless, it was commendable that she carved out time for her training sessions with Wilhelm. Or perhaps, it indicated just how passionate a knight could be about the sword, even if they were a woman.
In any case, time for Subaru appeared to pass meaningfully from the outside.
Treated like a guest without complaint, Subaru himself sought to find something he could do within the given environment, enthusiastically learning and honing his skills.
Despite being beaten down, a certain pride embodied in him as a boy seemed to shine through.
At the very least, from appearances—.
***
The tip of a wooden sword struck his forehead, sending him spinning backwards in the next moment, propelled by centrifugal force.
As his head rotated backward, Subaru experienced the familiar sensation of the world flipping upside down. He swung his arms frantically in anticipation of landing, preparing for a roll to cushion the fall.
His gray tracksuit, which he wore for outings, became dirty with the earth, but the structurally pure fall caused almost no damage. He licked his lips, tasting the dirt that had stuck to them, and promptly spat it out.
“Ugh, blegh! Tastes muddy and grassy—ugh!”
“Shall we call it a day then?”
“You must be joking. Did I look like I broke from that? I’m still kicking strong!”
Subaru jabbed the wooden sword forward like a home run signal, causing his waist to rotate, showcasing his fighting spirit. In response, Wilhelm standing in front of him chuckled softly.
Day in and day out, the sparring sessions between Subaru and Wilhelm continued.
Although Subaru’s attacks still failed to reach Wilhelm, there had been a dramatic change in how Subaru reacted to Wilhelm’s assaults. Namely,
“This may be harsh to say, but… your falling technique has improved tremendously.”
“Well, it kinda feels pathetic to have to focus on how to fall without getting hurt, but I won’t just stay in the same spot forever!”
Giving a thumbs-up in response to Wilhelm’s words, Subaru stood there, basking in his own glory.
Wilhelm’s words rang true. In these past few days, the improvement in Subaru’s falling technique had reached a level that could impress a pro.
After all, he had at least thirty chances for practical application each day. Don’t dismiss falling as mere triviality; still, it was falling.
Falling unguardedly resulted in a higher risk of injuries. Even if Wilhelm applied a marvelous restraint to his strikes, Subaru rolling on the ground after impact carried a risk of injuries he would be responsible for.
“Now, such rising talent in the art of falling—day by day, I feel like I’m only perfecting the role of a victim!”
“Moreover, this skill becomes quite useless in a serious duel with a real sword.”
“Could you not state obvious things? My refuted pride just cracked!”
Though the notion of a brutal loss in a true spar was real, Subaru’s sharpening skills primarily focused on training with wooden swords. Moreover, these techniques were designed not for offense, but aimed at being the base of performance in approaching defeat. Regardless,
“Please, just one more, if you would.”
“Anytime, from any angle.”
Gaining permission, Subaru took up stance and crouched low, charging once more. Wilhelm’s initial move was slower than Subaru anticipated despite the advantageous stance he held with his wooden sword.
The man was elderly despite his large build; it was challenging to envision him keeping pace with Subaru’s movements, especially when he swung his sword.
But,
“Too many wasted movements.”
“Ugh.”
Even when Subaru attempted to minimize his movements, the excessive tension and unnecessary exertion gave Wilhelm openings to evade Subaru’s attacks with minimal effort and movement. Following this, as Wilhelm redirected his blade, it struck at Subaru’s side.
“Franken!”
The moment Subaru felt the sword’s flat side hit his flank, he was effortlessly launched into the air by Wilhelm’s strike, seemingly lacking power.
Propelled by the momentum of the lunge, Subaru floated over the white-haired elder, flipping in mid-air. If he should land headfirst, it would certainly end in catastrophe.
“No way, not like this!”
Just before the fall began, Subaru shook his head and curled up, cradling his head in a defensive posture. That stance mirrored the ‘coconut’ position he once displayed to Roswaal. By tightly balling up his body, his defensive capability increased, a rudimentary form of defense for novices.
Though the way his body spun in the air was based heavily on chance, he rationalized that as long as he didn’t fall on the back of his head, he could minimize damage inflicted to himself.
“Did I say this is where it ends?”
Subaru’s plan was thwarted before he could fall when a wooden sword’s tip slid between the gaps of his hands and feet.
With his focus entirely on falling, the thrusting tip was a complete surprise to him. The sword twisted like a curve, easily unbinding Subaru’s tightly wrapped limbs and naturally causing him to spread out in flight.
“Gyaah!”
Just like that, he was slammed to the ground in a sprawling position, unable to take any sort of fall.
Subaru’s nose crashed into the earth in a kiss, feeling the familiar sensation with the ground once again.
A wave of pain surged through his body, so he rolled to the side and shot a resentful glare at Wilhelm, who was looking down on him.
“Wasn’t that a bit too much!?”
“You must learn to take falls even when expectations exceed your presumptions; only then can you genuinely call it progress. More importantly—”
With a harsher tone dismissing Subaru’s protests, Wilhelm paused to look down at him with calm eyes.
In those eyes was a serene stillness, sparkling with unfathomable emotions that caused Subaru to feel somewhat exasperated and fall silent. Wilhelm then spoke to him.
“I shall not condone yours to approach a fight while holding the mindset of losing from the start.”
“Ugh…”
That had cut home.
He understood there was a gulf between their strengths. To Subaru, Wilhelm was such a towering wall. However, understanding the disparity in their prowess was entirely different from accepting defeat before even trying.
Feeling exposed and without a retort, Wilhelm raised a single finger and said,
“Before teaching you sword techniques or the art of falling, let us discuss something much more fundamental.”
“Fundamental…”
“—If you have decided to fight, fight with your whole being. Never take your attention off even for a moment, use any means necessary, employ any dirty tricks—to relentlessly grasp victory. As long as you still stand, your fingers still move, and your fangs are intact, keep standing. Stand up. Stand up, and strike down. While you are alive, keep fighting. Fight, fight, fight!”
“———”
At that moment, the tension that blanketed the garden dispersed, and Subaru perceived the thunderous rhythm of his heart.
Moreover, he felt an unmistakable reminder that his heart was still beating with life.
—He was alive, and the sensation of being alive was unmistakably present now.
The atmosphere that shrouded Wilhelm changed as he began to speak about the mindset required for battle. Until that moment, he had seemed like a gentle gentleman; a presence devoid of passion or brutality.
Yet, it became plainly felt that this was merely a surface-level impression of Wilhelm. In fact, what he showed just now could be the true Wilhelm himself.
The man invited to teach the sword under Crusch Karsten, the number one candidate in the Royal Selection—Wilhelm van Astraea.
A shiver of fundamental reverberation ran through Subaru, causing him to rise, concealing the sensation.
His limbs and fingertips tingled faintly, whether it was from pain, fear, or perhaps something else entirely remained unclear. But,
“Indeed… I’ve been passively rude in much of my behavior.”
He felt a weight of meaning in those words.
Shaking his head, refusing to wipe off the dirt from his body, Subaru squared off against Wilhelm while gripping the wooden sword tighter.
“Even knowing I’ll lose, I’ll rise to try for victory. It seems contradictory, yet I can feel clearly that I have to… understand it with my emotions, not just in my head.”
“That is more than enough.”
“If I can accomplish that, could I get a bit stronger?”
At Subaru’s inquiry, Wilhelm replied knowingly, “I shall see.”
“What’s separate from this, a strong desire to become strong differs from actually becoming strong.”
“Wouldn’t it be beautiful if you simply agreed on that?”
“I do not permit myself the indulgence of misleading statements.”
“Sometimes that might itself become an unkind truth!”
Just when the conversation began to neatly tie together, it quickly devolved into a mess. Subaru’s shoulders drooped, and he glanced dejectedly at the ground, venting his frustration.
“Do you think I have any talent for the sword?”
“Based on my judgment, regrettably, not really. Your sword talent is akin to that of an average person—similar to mine.”
The denial of his question struck Subaru surprisingly hard, raising an eyebrow in shock.
“You’re strangely humble there. How can someone like Wilhelm not have talent for the sword?”
“It’s a fact. I possess no talent for the sword. Had I possessed it, I wouldn’t have continued grasping a sword for this long. Thus, if you wish, you too can reach that same point.”
“…Just how much effort would that take?”
“It’s not a significant feat. Simply dedicate half a lifetime to wielding a sword.”
“Just that?”
Naturally, such a statement wasn’t easy to dismiss.
They often claimed real talent lies in the ability to persist through effort. In reality, even if Subaru was told he could reach the same status as Wilhelm, he had neither the conviction to spend that time on the sword nor the motivation to find a reason to do so.
Honestly, even the mere fact that Subaru was training under Wilhelm—
“Sigh.”
Exhaling softly and shifting slightly in a resigned manner, Subaru’s wooden sword tipped against the soil, splattering dirt at Wilhelm’s feet.
The instant the dirt clouded old Wilhelm’s vision, Subaru aimed a jab at his feet. It was the same bait he had just recently received advice on.
—If you choose to fight, don’t hesitate to employ any means necessary.
The earnest strike ended in failure, transmitting no resistance. Nonetheless, Subaru wasn’t done yet; spinning off momentum from the missed strike, he executed a roundhouse kick while simultaneously delivering a second swing of the sword.
As Wilhelm skillfully dodged the blade aiming for his feet and avoided the surprise strike, he flashed a smile that revealed his teeth with enjoyment.
“That’s how it should be.”
As the kick came under Wilhelm’s evasive measures, he spun while drawing closer, eliminating the space between them, and grabbed Subaru by his collar, lifting him off the ground.
In an instant, the world spun as he was tossed away, failing to grasp what was happening before slamming onto the hard earth once more. The impact stole his breath, thoughts faded at once, and before pain could reach him, it was the wooden sword thrust against his face that quickly summoned his awareness.
“Shall I call it a day now?”
With that announcement, he released his remaining strength, shutting his eyes tight.
The chill of the ground seeped into him, and soon he could feel the pulsating sensations of discomfort streaming throughout his body. Thus, he murmured,
“With a mind full of distractions, I can’t fight well.”
“But I believe that’s not true.”
“Even so, isn’t that the path to getting stronger? By relentlessly throwing yourself at the sword, that’s how you learn what it means to become a true swordsman.”
“No one suddenly becomes strong by merely grasping something, and whether it be in a state of calm or chaotic distraction, the essence of winning remains steadfast; the one who manages to cut their opponent down wins in the end.”
While affirming that dry perspective, Wilhelm then added, “Moreover,”
“It may be harsh to say, but I’ve rarely swung a sword purely with a calm heart. Especially not during the early days when I wielded it; all I could think of were my wife.”
“Wilhelm can drop wife talk at times, it gets a bit rough, you know!”
Subaru recalled those affectionate mentions made during their initial meeting, marveling at Wilhelm’s tendency to lean heavily towards praise of his beloved partner.
As he sat up, Subaru regarded Wilhelm with a quizzical glance while thinking:
“He’s often discussing how devoted he is to his wife; what is this unexpected revelation I just received? Is it true that I don’t have to become solely fixated on just the sword?”
Wilhelm proclaimed that to grow strong, one had to be committed to the craft and dictated their fate through diligence. The ultimate objective was to spend incidents upon incidents done on the body, evolving through hardship.
“Geez, this sounds tough.”
While saying that, he couldn’t suppress the bitter smile beginning to etch itself onto his lips.
Being told there was no sword talent weighed heavy on him. He might have trained in kendo during his previous life for some time, and he’d held onto that pride stubbornly.
However, confronting the stark reality where that conception crumbled vehemently felt overwhelming.
Yet, despite the bitter glimmer of negativity, he faced Wilhelm with a challenging gaze, replying with determination, “Either way, this will be the mindset I maintain to become strong. Well, that’s rather insightful for a teacher to impart, but do you think it’ll be feasible for me?”
“That will depend entirely on how you perceive it from here on. Even asserting of yourself won’t guarantee victory.”
“Why not take a moment to acknowledge the reality around you so we can share a beautiful story together!?”
“I do not allow myself to fabricate heavy truths to lessen the weight of reality.”
“Sometimes the truth itself carries substantial weight!”
It was that moment when Subaru felt everything coming together unravel completely, as his fears suddenly began to surface, causing him to pause with a heightened commitment toward learning.
“Do I even have a talent for the sword?”
“Based on my assessment, regrettably, there isn’t much potential. Your sword talent rests at the average level—much like mine.”
The denial caused Subaru to gasp in disbelief.
“Maybe you’re just underselling your talents! A sword talent of someone like Wilhelm doesn’t exist!?”
“It’s an undeniable fact. I’m devoid of talent in swordsmanship. Had I possessed even an ounce of it, I surely would’ve grasped it long ago and held onto the sword much longer.”
Tilting his head, Subaru summoned courage and voiced, “What if I want to reach the same point?”
“It’s far from simple, just dedicate half a lifetime to chasing that sword.”
“Just that?”
Such a matter wasn’t that simple despite appearing innocuous.
Real endurance while working hard is indeed true talent. In reality, even if Wilhelm stated that Subaru had the potential to match him, there was no conviction in Subaru’s heart to trade that time against a sword with an unwavering commitment.
The fact that Subaru was even training under Wilhelm inspired doubts, the bitter realization resulting in a feeling of repetitiveness.
“I sigh.”
His breezy exhalation nudged him, and he shifted his posture.
“I don’t think I’ll have that much of an effect on much of a talent for sword skills.”
“How long could that take to achieve?”
“Achieving extraordinary prowess requires a dedicated endeavor, progressing from the ordinary through the possible.”
“So just putting effort might change things?”
“Bear in mind, talents aren’t something that springs from mere hope or wishful thinking. Perseverance breeds destruction.”
“Sometimes harsh truths could serve as potent weapons against defeat!”
As the conversation gradually started coming together, it quickly turned into chaos, accompanied by a renewed air of discomfort.
“Do I possess any talent for the sword?”
“At my discretion, regrettably, I’d have to say you don’t much.”
He quietly delivered his blunt response, but within those words, there emerged traces of personal humor.
The realization struck Subaru somewhat harshly, as he flashed a knowing smile at Wilhelm.
“I suppose we could call that a thorough evaluation…”
Shifting slightly side to side, he tightened his grip on the wooden sword again, then stood up resolutely.
“Being aware that I may very well lose at the moment, I still feel there’s a drive within me to rise for that victory!”
“I couldn’t agree more.”
“Will it make me strong?”
With unwavering steadiness in his voice, Wilhelm considered Subaru’s question for a moment and finally nodded once.
“That much remains dependent upon choice, does it not? It’s one thing if you feel a drive to become stronger.”
“That sounds reasonably inspirational in theory.”
As he instinctively grinned, he caught the twinkle of gleaming hope reflected in Wilhelm’s eyes, back whipping out his confidence.
“You seem like you’ve got a degree of determination within there, don’t you?”
“That’s indeed the case!”
In that pivotal moment, Subaru empowered himself, bolstering his spirit.
“So let’s go, and fight like there’s no tomorrow!”
Warping desire into reality, he swung the sword with newfound fervor.
The warmth of resolve began to buoy him, granting the confidence to face the challenge ahead.
“So this should be memory.”
As glassy-eyed determination enveloped him, there remained pieces of sentiment and awe still clawing at his thoughts.
***
Time continued its march forward, unveiling the respective paths that lay ahead amid cautious breaths.
Whether the struggles were trivial or monumental, the fleeting smoke of ambition tended to breathe new vigor and breathe deep strength into those ready to embrace it.
With familiarity intertwined with fatigue, they kept pushing against and through themselves, unrelenting in the face of it all.
—The gate to their shared destinies had opened, and beyond that lay impossible choices to be made, conflicts to be faced, and destinies to be drawn.
In a world where the extraordinary and agonizing inevitably intertwined, they held their breaths, suspended in the realm that spoke of the unknown.
When dusk descended upon the kingdom, swallowed in its enchanting twilight, everything that might have been remained somewhat in shadows.
And amidst it all, what histories would unfold in the wake of chaos?
“`