It wasn’t difficult to get an agreement from the teachers. Still, it seems they knew their own situation well, as one started signing after seeing the first one do it, and the others followed suit one by one.
How much I would repay or how I would do it is something I can’t tell right now. They might change their minds later and refuse to pay back.
Well, I can think about that when the time comes. Honestly, I didn’t like having to worry about all this because of those kinds of people in the first place.
The reason that person still hasn’t reacted is that “I” haven’t finished my work yet. Whether I forgive those people or completely blow them away, I need to show proof that I’m satisfied so they can feel at ease.
Really, they were a person who needed a lot of hands in various ways.
From their perspective, I suppose they’d think the same about me.
I’m planning to cut ties with my mother as quickly as possible. It would be better to cut off the people working in the mansion long-term as well. I don’t care what happens to me, but having those kinds of people working in this mansion might be uncomfortable for them.
Or should I sell the mansion and move into a smaller house?
Honestly, I’m satisfied with just having my room. Whether the house is large or small, the important thing is that I’m with that person inside; what’s the problem?
A space where I can just hang out with my occasional visiting friends is enough.
“And what remains… is ‘getting along comfortably with the other kids?’”
That seems a bit difficult.
I didn’t know how to comfortably get along with others. In fact, I felt that the people already around me were sufficient.
“So, it might be a bit inconvenient for you guys, but I think I’ll have to stay here for a while.”
Well, it’ll just take a little time, I suppose. As long as that person is inside me, I definitely have the upper hand. Whether I get along well with other kids or not, that person wouldn’t know.
Of course, I didn’t consider “not getting along” as an option. If I make the kids at school into enemies, that person will worry. It’s also about ruining the things that person did for me.
But that doesn’t mean I was actively thinking of “trying to get along well.”
After just spending an appropriate amount of time, when we meet in dreams later, I could just say I’m doing well and thank them.
“I don’t care.”
That day, after school, inside my room, Sohee said that.
It was easy to predict Sohee would say something like that.
“You’re Sara, aren’t you?”
“……”
Every time I heard that, something tickled in my chest.
It wasn’t just because Sohee liked me purely; rather, there was a pleasant feeling in that “I and all those people are the same Sara.”
“I don’t care either. You, that kid, you’re all my friends.”
…… Well, when someone talks about “friends,” it does sound a bit different in meaning.
However, as Ha Neul said, it seems that even when calling each other “friends,” attitudes can differ. They think of each other as rivals but still, Ha Neul remains on my side.
“……”
Sua seemed to be deep in thought, as if she didn’t hear what I said.
“……”
For a moment, the room fell silent.
It wasn’t a nasty and heavy silence. Rather, it felt like we were just not speaking to each other… I’m not sure since it’s my first time having friends.
After a brief silence, Sohee clapped her hands and spoke.
“Weren’t we supposed to start with Sara washing today?”
Since it was always a room with three people, and Ha Neul frequently came to sleep over, it seemed like there was an unspoken washing order established; they would rotate who went first.
Today seemed to be my turn to wash first.
“Then, I’ll go first.”
Nodding at Sohee’s words, I stood up. There weren’t any particular exchanges while I entered the shower room.
*
Since when did I start taking showers alone?
I’m not quite sure how others do, but I think I started taking showers by myself when I was around nine. After my father passed away, and my mother left me in this mansion, I had to do everything myself.
Ah, maybe not “everything.”
The essentials for living were taken care of by others regardless.
I didn’t have to do laundry, cooking, or washing dishes. I didn’t even clean.
In a sense, that might make it feel even lonelier.
Before I turned nine, I have vague memories of showering with my mother. Memories of cleaning the room or mixing dough… those memories are faint childhood memories that remain in between.
But since then, I couldn’t do anything with someone else.
I didn’t have anything I needed to do separately, nor did I need to.
I was just living here.
“……”
Well, at least now I’m not alone, so I should be grateful.
…… I know that I like those kids or that person.
But I couldn’t stay with those kids forever. Even if I liked them now, I thought I wouldn’t be able to be with them for years or even decades.
At least, I didn’t think I’d be able to eat and sleep together like this.
But that’s okay.
“Yeah, it’s okay.”
I placed my hand on my chest.
I could feel my heart beating.
It had paused once, but that heart began to beat again thanks to that person.
Even after several years or decades, I’ll still be with this person.
I no longer have to be alone and lonely forever.
As I stood there under the shower, lost in thought—
Suddenly, bang.
“Ugh!?”
The shower door swung open unexpectedly, and I let out a sound without meaning to.
Turning around, I found Sua standing there.
Her hair, usually tied in pigtails, was now let down, making her look much more lively, although I thought she had a somewhat shy personality. To me, this look seemed to suit Sua better.
Sua’s face was flushed, and she had a towel wrapped around her body.
“S-Sua…?”
I asked, flustered, and Sua lifted her downcast gaze to look at me.
“S-Sara.”
“Uh, yeah?”
“Um, can I join you while you wash?”
“Uh….”
All of a sudden?
No, more than that, was Ha Neul and Sohee just quietly letting this happen? Given their personalities, I thought they would either stop her from going in or insist on joining.
Of course, if we all went in, the shower room would feel quite cramped.
“Um… okay.”
But I thought it wouldn’t matter much.
After all, we’re both girls.
Bathhouses have women’s baths, and the changing rooms are separated by gender. If we can change clothes in the same place, isn’t it okay to wash together?
So I nodded in agreement. Sua smiled bashfully at my response. She still seemed embarrassed, her face still flushed.
*
Lee Sua didn’t have much time to be with ‘Sara.’
No, it would be more correct to say there wasn’t much ‘time to be alone together.’ Though when it came to being together, they were sharing the same bed every day.
Ha Neul occasionally seemed to talk alone with Sara or ‘Sara.’ During class, it appeared she went out with Sohee to have conversations.
While I had never seen Sohee talking alone with Sara, she talked with Sara regardless of who was next to her. She was the type who didn’t really care about the gazes of those around her. Lee Sua somewhat envied her.
Lee Sua also wanted to talk alone with Sara like that. But saying that to the other two seemed too awkward. Because she knew what she had done to ‘Sara’ in the past, and how the two of them were in front of ‘Sara.’
That opportunity found its way to her purely by coincidence.
“Shin Sohee.”
“Ah, yes, senior!”
“Could you help me for a moment?”
“Yes!”
For some reason, Yang Hye-in came and took Sohee away with her, and
“Oh.”
A call came in for Ha Neul.
“What’s going on?”
The diligent Ha Neul always told her parents first when she was going to sleep here. Her parents trusted her, so it seemed they didn’t confirm separately.
But today, Ha Neul received a call.
“Ah, sorry, I’ll take this call.”
Had she not expected to leave Lee Sua alone in the room? Ha Neul told her so.
When Lee Sua nodded, she also left the room.
Thus, Lee Sua was left alone in the room.
“……”
As she sat there blankly, she heard ‘Sara’ showering.
And a thought crossed Lee Sua’s mind.
‘The time to be alone with Sara.’
Without really thinking, Lee Sua jumped up.
