[Hmm? Was it too cold in the capsule? ← Today’s NoName broke the record for worst remarks]
As soon as they said that, whether you were a kid or not, you’d have been called a ‘brat’ without hesitation.
The moment I heard it, my head went blank and my heart started thud-thud racing—imagine how the commentators felt.
I can 100% guarantee that if an average person endured living in a capsule for seven years, just thinking about it would trigger PTSD.
But turning that painful memory into humor takes guts, I tell you.
After seeing this, I decided to respect NoName for life.
I admit it; NoName, you’re beyond a genius, you’re a god.
—
[Comments]
– Choi Woo-joo, the commentator, sounded genuinely surprised and stumbled over his words for a bit, haha!
– Honestly, I see this as a monumental moment. I feel a bit moved by Na-me’s will to overcome her past and think about the present and future.
– Not just a wicked complainant, not just a wicked promising talent, but a true ‘wicked’.
– I admit the remarks evoke respect.
– Maybe it was to care for the fans? To tell them not to feel too inferior due to past incidents.
└ I was thinking the same. I don’t think Na-me just said it for fun.
└ If that’s the case, isn’t that more thoughtful than most adults?
└ NoName is super considerate, yes indeed.
—
[If NoName isn’t selected as the representative for the National Exchange Tournament, I’ll boycott Korea.]
How is it possible that kids can’t duel? The commentary should be like something out of a prophecy!
If NoName isn’t selected, I will boycott everything coming out of Korea!
Shall I start with boycotting my house?
—
[Comments]
– Uhm… are you already practicing your boycott?
└ Uhm… oh dear…
└ sniff sniff I’m in a constant state of boycott.
– House, car, maybe employment or marriage too?
– NoName absolutely has to go. Just gaining experience next year and winning in the following year would be legendary.
—
*
“What are you staring at?”
“Nothing much. Wow, is it that you get prizes even without competing? Isn’t that a bit much? So how much did you win?”
“Let’s see. One, two… Five bills, so that’s 500,000 won.”
After finishing my grueling schedule and returning home, I fanned the money like a whoosh in the wind.
“So really, why did you receive that? There’s no reason for you to get an award.”
Adella squinted one eye, dissatisfied.
“When the budget is left over, it’s right to spend it all. That’s a universal truth.”
Here’s how the event unfolded.
After the national exchange tournament, there was a sudden surge in public opinion that the country should support its talents so as not to lose them anymore.
Especially, Seoul City has specially supported 50 million won this year for the budget used for the Academy Competition.
In fact, they mostly wanted to keep me chained down.
Though the Japanese hype ultimately fizzled out, many other countries have been reaching out to me since that event without hesitation.
The Mayor of Seoul even attended the tournament in person to see me, but I didn’t even make an appearance while doing commentary.
So, to facilitate our meeting somehow, the principals conferred and gifted me this award.
“So I received 500,000 won as a reward for just shaking hands?”
“Something like that.”
“Ugh, fine. Give me back the scarf I lent you in the morning.”
“Sorry.”
“Huh?”
“I actually lost it. It must have blown away while I was away receiving the award. I clearly set it under the drink. I’ll buy you a new one.”
“No, that scarf was the one I treasured most…!”
“I said I’m sorry, okay? I messed up.”
I spread my arms and wrapped around Adella’s waist.
And then I raised my face, making the most apologetic expression I could muster.
Adella started to slightly avoid my gaze but eventually surrendered to my look of earnest apology.
“Can I order it for dawn delivery tomorrow? Since you messed up.”
“Yeah, of course.”
“Just make sure to take good care of it. Why did you leave it there? We all knew today was going to be really windy.”
Adella grumbled while searching for items on her shopping list.
“Let me know how much it costs. I’ll transfer the money right away.”
Just as I was about to leave her room, a short scream echoed from behind.
“Wah!”
“What’s wrong?”
“Is it sold out here too? No way!”
“Are there no other shopping malls selling it?”
“Here… there… they’re all sold out!”
“No way.”
Adella’s words were, surprisingly enough, true.
Every single online shopping mall announced that the scarf she lent me was sold out.
“Is this a prank? Are you pranking me? Right!”
“Hmm? Not at all. I could never buy out every scarf across the country just to prank you.”
“Uh… true, that makes sense… But what is this situation? It’s not like it’s a famous scarf.”
“Sometimes, coincidences like this can happen in life.”
Adella stood still, deep in thought.
She suddenly had an idea and searched for the scarf in the community.
And finally, she discovered the source of the sold-out frenzy.
“Just as I thought, you were the culprit!”
Naver’s real-time trending search term ranked 7th.
—
[NoName Scarf]
“Why exactly?”
—
*
The power stars hold in the fashion industry is beyond imagination.
It’s almost said that trends are led not by fashion shows but by paparazzi photos surfacing on the internet.
And Na-me’s appearance on official broadcasts drew immense public interest.
Although not on the three major networks, having a nine-year-old commentating on official broadcasts was unprecedented on Earth.
Even those who usually didn’t pay attention to the Academy Competition wondered, “Did that really happen?”
Every time a photograph of Na-me was shared online, her business attire, scarf, hair tie, watch, and even KFC chicken tenders she had eaten in her private time were suddenly under the spotlight.
Companies enjoying marketing effects without spending a dime were overjoyed.
In fact, marketers took the opportunity to express their gratitude through Na-me’s social media after.
In a capitalist society, even acts of gratitude can be viewed as a part of marketing.
—
[NoNaMe_11]
(Academy Competition QTwish Broadcast.jpg)
[It was a pleasure to commentate alongside caster Yoon Geon and commentator Choi Woo-joo.]
—
[Comments]
– KFC_Korea★: Thank you so much for the heart-stopping chicken tender mukbang! If you visit the headquarters, we’ll give you unlimited chicken tender coupons!
└ Haha, finally appeared. I was wondering when they were coming.
└ Is it too much fuss over just eating chicken tenders? But Na-me was just too cute…
└ When Na-me was on screen, everyone cheered hilarious!
– Wow, what is with the beauty and vibe of a 9-year-old…
– Is a business suit such a cute outfit?
– I loved hearing your voice all day long sob sob.
– Why is the Academy Competition only once a year?
– Thumbs up for NoName, it’s the truth!
A company providing tailored clothes for QBS has hit it big, and the children’s Swatch watch that Na-me wore caused similar sell-out phenomena.
A video of a KFC part-timer placing an order for 50 servings of chicken tenders garnered a little buzz too.
However, nowhere could you find the retailer for the jeweled hair tie Na-me wore.
—
[Does anyone know where to buy the NoName hair tie?]
[They say the price for that hair tie is expected to be at least a million won ㄷㄷ]
[But hasn’t it been quite a while since she started wearing that hair tie?]
[It’s not that it’s sold out, it literally seems nowhere in the worldㅋㅋㅋ]
[Let’s analyze NoName V-tube.]
Many VTubers began their investigations.
Internet detectives and amateur Bill Gates finally found an interview Na-me did in Japan, where she mentioned the location of Jeonbuk Gunsan.
Then, upon entering Na-me’s V-tube, they deduced a place called ‘Duri Do’ only from the mountain ridges and rocky islands seen in a year-old video titled “NoName vs. Sebastian.”
No one lives on Duri Do, so while looking around the nearby Bian Do, they discovered a small shop dealing with ‘Jung Myung Craft’, a mage merchandise store.
Mage merchandise stores, due to their expensive product prices, primarily exist only in Seoul or metropolitan areas.
A shop selling mage merchandise on an island with a population not even reaching 200 is truly suspicious, don’t you think?
A wave of phone calls began immediately.
“Is this the place where I can buy the NoName hair tie?”
“Huh? Hair tie? Are you talking about mage merchandise? That was a gift I received; I can’t just sell it to anyone.”
“Wow, so it is! Can I order the same hair tie that Na-me bought?”
“Who are you to keep asking me that? It’s not even close to 5 million won, so why don’t you watch your language and hang up?”
“Whether it’s 5 million or 10 million won, I’ll pay!”
“What?”
—
The rumors spread like wildfire, and it quickly became an article.
—
[“More expensive than a used car”… What on earth is the NoName hair tie?]
People focused on the fact that the handmade hair tie Na-me wore was worth as much as 4 million won.
On top of that, considering she wore two on both sides, that’s a minimum of 8 million.
Reactions varied widely.
– Oh dear, how much for a hair tie, like 800 grand?
– They say it has a whole gem set into it? That’s why it’s so expensive, haha!
– The rich must be going crazy trying to get their hands on this.
– Isn’t wearing something like this on a broadcast too extravagant and encouraging children’s vanity and affluence…?
– Wow, I feel a bit existential coming on.
– At first glance, it seems a bit too flashy and hard to pull off, but on Na-me, it looks classy.
– That hair tie is truly beautiful sob sob sob, totally my style.
There were opinions arguing that whatever Na-me wears is her freedom, while others believed at least high-priced accessories should be avoided in official broadcasts.
Meanwhile, Grandmaster Baek Bong-gon called Na-me to inform her that he was in trouble due to nonstop inquiries about sales.
“Those pearls on your tie are literally just lying around, and here I don’t have a single gem left. It’s not that I’m not selling; it’s just that I can’t. Can you please tell people so they stop annoying me with calls?”
“Wait a minute, Grandpa. If it’s okay to use cheap gems, could you make just one for me?”
“Just one? What are you talking about? The hair tie?”
“No, um… Let’s say I might need a hundred.”
—
*
[NoName]
[Just Chatting – Major announcement regarding the hair tie (sponsored), part two will be a recap of the competition]
[Broadcasting Time – 0:10:46]
[Number of Viewers – 12,785]
For ten minutes, viewers were only looking at a black screen, but based on the title, they engaged in a heated discussion.
Was it that Na-me had finally decided to sell the hair tie?
If so, it could be the first official merchandise launched under the name NoName.
Few fans were jealous that Na-me showed up in something expensive.
Compared to the money Na-me had made from selling the Bio-Akashic, this was quite frugal.
Adding an 800,000 won ornament to a 200 billion won Christmas tree doesn’t change anything.
Moreover, the fans knew well about her good deeds.
They simply hoped that Na-me wouldn’t be hurt by a minority opinion.
“Ah, hello!”
As always, a voice that sounded like it had never inhaled fine dust before appeared.
“Ah, I forgot to do the opening since I was waiting for you all. Should we take a break for another 7 minutes?”
– No no no no no!
– Ah jeez, don’t troll like that!
– You know it’s only quiet when you show up.
– Na-me, we’re freezing over here.
– This wicked girl… wicked kid… wicked baby…
As days went by, her ability to charm her viewers grew.
As the darkness that filled the rectangular screen retreated, a soft glow of baby-like skin appeared.
Her skin was so pale that it practically looked supernatural.
– ???
– Did she smother her face in something? laughs
– This is yet another fresh dramatic entrance.
– At the age of 9, she should be conscious of her appearance.
– Haha, Na-me, you’re too cute!
– What brand is that mask from?
Na-me cautiously sat down in a chair, with an aloe mask on her face, being careful not to let it fall.
Her face looked so small that all four corners of the adult-sized mask had folded in on themselves.
“I won’t tell you what mask it is. Nowadays, too many people suspect backdoor advertising. This isn’t an ad; I bought it myself.”
The viewers felt wronged.
But since it wasn’t entirely an invisible remark, they had no choice but to accept Na-me’s statement.
Though she had always shown her bare face, it was clear that fresh-faced Na-me had one distinct change.
She hadn’t done her usual twin tails.
She shook her long hair from side to side.
When Na-me peeled off the mask, her glowing skin was revealed.
Then, she brought the much-discussed hair tie closer for the viewers to see.
“They say this is trending these days? So, I prepared a little event for you guys.”
click-
With a mouse click, the PPT slide Na-me had prepared appeared.
—
[Johnson & Johnson, comprehensive treatment for Multiple Sclerosis, Persizumab (generic name: Persizumab) released]
It wasn’t a mask or a hair tie, just one photo of a pharmaceutical product with English text.
Na-me began her detailed explanation.
“There are about 3 million patients worldwide and roughly 2,000 in Korea suffering from rare Multiple Sclerosis, which is deemed untreatable.
Persizumab, which was just approved by the FDA yesterday, can treat almost all cases of Multiple Sclerosis without relapse.
Johnson & Johnson has decided to respect the opinions of Bio-Akashic employees and sell it at a low price of 3,000 dollars for a year’s worth of treatment, approximately 5 million won.”
The slide moved to the next page.
A photo of a hair tie almost identical to the one Na-me wore appeared.
“I received 100 million won from Johnson & Johnson for promotional purposes, and I’ve added 400 million of my own to donate a total of 500 million won to 100 patients with Multiple Sclerosis.
However, many patients still find this price burdensome.
Therefore, our Janjeol Clan has decided to raise funds for patients with incurable diseases.”
Below the photo was text that read:
—
[50&50]
“Johnson & Johnson has also decided to donate an extra 10% on the amount you all donate.
For the 50 highest donors and randomly for 50 others, a total of 100 people will receive a hair tie personally made by Grandmaster Baek Bong-gon.
Please note that the hair tie I currently own is a medical product, which can cause significant headaches for individuals.
Thus, the hair ties given as gifts will be made using crystals of the same color and shape, so thank you for your understanding.”
After finishing the presentation, Na-me looked at the chat window.
There, a scene resembling praise or worship was unfolding.
Na-me smiled contentedly and said in a gentle voice.
“Please clip this for the editor and upload it to the V-tube and Fan Café. Include the donation account and site, too.”
