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Siyun is dead. I saw it clearly with my own eyes.

There is no doubt about it. Words like “Wasn’t there any way to survive?” are meaningless from the start.

His arms and legs could be gone, or his lower body could be blown away. Even if only part of his head were injured, there are countless accidents where one could miraculously survive, but that was not the case for Siyun.

Siyun, who had once been in my arms, appeared in a state that no matter how you looked at it, was biologically impossible to survive.

And five years have passed.

In front of me, someone appeared with the same name as Siyun.

It was hard to recall Siyun just from his appearance. To be honest, he didn’t resemble him at all. I thought that if Siyun had an older sister or a younger sister, they would probably look more like him.

But this entirely different Siyun reminded me of him in every other aspect.

The expression he made when eating something bitter was similar. The way he shyly smiled when our eyes met was similar. The way his lips move whenever he reads something, or how he dozes off under the warm sunlight, nodding off, was similar.

The way he glanced back when his name was called was similar.

“Older Sister.”

Siyun used to say that whenever he was flustered. That slip of the tongue would make me unconsciously overlap him with the Siyun I remembered.

“…Because it’s this kind of world. You said that when we were younger.”

“Is it really this kind of world?”

Ah, that’s right, he asked me that.

Siyun had asked me that while I was doing volunteer activities.

When Siyun was young and asked me why I was doing good deeds, I had answered like that just to put on a front.

But Siyun took those words seriously. And he lived according to those words, and then… he died.

It was because of me. Siyun died because of me.

“So… I am Siyun. I might have changed in appearance… No, not just my appearance, a lot has changed, but I am the Siyun that Older Sister remembers.”

He resembled the old Siyun, I thought. I even wondered how someone could resemble him so closely.

However, watching this Siyun speak like that, I couldn’t figure out how to think.

“…I went to another world.”

Normally, I might have gotten angry.

I haven’t often shown anger in front of others, but still, if it touched my memories with Siyun, I couldn’t help but be upset.

But what Siyun said was… a story I had never told anyone else.

“Because it’s this kind of world, it’s nice to help each other and live together.”

That was the day he first said those words.

Siyun remembered that day. So vividly.

So, I tried to make an effort.

Because I wanted to believe.

I wanted to believe that the Siyun who I could never meet again was right in front of me.

Inside me, I felt like I was fighting and rolling around as two people. One part insisted that I had to believe because it was Siyun, the one I cherished so much, who had finally returned to me here.

Called by a God, reincarnated, having pushed through hardship just because he wanted to see me again, he eventually came back to this very spot.

That fact made me feel chills of joy. Even in such a situation, he didn’t forget me and wanted to see me.

And it was also a bit sad.

In the end, the fact that Siyun was dead hadn’t changed.

The child before me, possessing a more feminine body than mine, could only exist because he had died and come back.

But there was also a part of me that interfered with that thought.

It logically didn’t make sense. It was something only possible in delusion, not reality.

Kingdom, Nobility, Elf, Magic, Demon King, Hero.

In fact, you could easily make up these words if you wanted to. You could even create names for the world. The names of cities, names of demon officials, legends about the demon king, and other characters’ names could be fabricated too.

It was the same with stories about my memories with him.

I had never shared those stories with anyone else, but maybe Siyun did. If he had perhaps told such stories to deceive me…

…Then what would the reason be for deceiving me? That’s what the side of me that wanted to believe asked.

What gain could be had from deceiving me?

This kid, who lives in such a large apartment, who has that much wealth, would spend long hours working at that bakery just to deceive someone like me with nothing? Why? Just because he likes me?

There must have been countless other methods.

…

Having put forward the logic, I couldn’t come up with a response.

“…I guess you really can’t trust me, huh?”

Siyun smiled awkwardly.

Is this… acting?

Before thinking about whether to trust or not, if this is acting, the expression was incredibly natural. He wouldn’t have looked out of place even if he was on TV.

And for at least the past three months I’ve seen him, he wasn’t such a good actor. His emotions were clearly expressed on his face.

And the Siyun I knew was the same.

“…”

So if he was trying to deceive me, he, in front of me, would have found someone who bears the exact same name as the dead person, and searched for someone who shared memories with that person to act flawlessly for three months.

And that would mean he would have been copying every action of the Siyun who died five years ago.

…This also doesn’t make sense.

So, I said.

“…It’s a hard story to believe.”

“Ah…”

At my answer, Siyun’s expression instantly fell. In fact, his expression hadn’t been that good throughout our conversation.

He had a slightly relaxed face when talking about the memories with those four, but as the conversation progressed, it seemed like he was overthinking how ridiculous the story sounded to me.

Why would someone who worked so hard to deceive me come up with such an absurd story to try to fool me?

No, at least in my mind, it wasn’t that way.

Demon King, Hero. If someone wanted to deceive me, wouldn’t it have been better to introduce a new religion? The story Siyun told me didn’t imply any consequence to me for not believing it. There was no mention of going to hell or suffering.

And it wasn’t about money either.

So, I said.

“But I will try to believe.”

“…Oh.”

At my words, Siyun lifted his head. His eyes widened as if he didn’t expect to hear such an answer.

I took hold of Siyun’s hands with both of mine.

Honestly, all that logic talk was just a way to attach reasons to things.

I simply wanted to believe in the Siyun in front of me.

I knew it was dangerous. If it wasn’t Siyun, but just someone trying to deceive me, it would be… well, how should I put it, a fatal blow. I might not be able to recover from that wound in the future.

But still…

The fluttering emotions I had felt since Siyun first appeared.

Even though on the surface he seemed like a different person, the strange attraction I felt was becoming harder to ignore.

…Well, maybe even saying “I will believe” was an act of attaching reasons to it.

I might have started to fall for the Siyun in front of me without realizing it.

So, maybe that’s why everything else doesn’t matter anymore.

However, even so.

“If you truly are Siyun, I would be really, really happy.”

Yes, it must be so.

Those five years during which I felt they would never be in vain. It felt like I was being compensated for all those days I spent unable to do anything while remembering Siyun.

Throughout my speech, Siyun didn’t blink even once.

It was almost as if he was frozen in place, staring at me like a statue.

Was he breathing?

I seriously thought, and seeing Siyun’s expression made me almost want to laugh.

“So, will you keep proving to me? So that I can believe you.”

I gripped Siyun’s hand tightly. It was damp. I didn’t know whether it was from my sweat or his.

Slowly, I moved closer to him.

Siyun’s face filled my vision.

Honestly, no matter how I looked at it, this was not the face of the Siyun I remembered.

But strangely, the expression on it seemed really like the one Siyun had when he was surprised.

“…”

This time, I held his hand tight so he couldn’t run away and closed my eyes.

Softness touched my lips.

Warm, gentle, and fragrant.

As I pursed my lips slightly, I could feel just how soft and warm Siyun’s lips were.

For a while, we stayed like that, eyes closed, our lips meeting, before I withdrew my body.

Siyun looked at me with slightly wet eyes.

It was my first kiss.

I hoped it was the same for him.

 

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