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I stared at Siyun without saying a word for a while.

It took me some time to grasp what Siyun was saying.

So… right now, Siyun is…

Those unwavering eyes were looking at me. Siyun was trying their hardest to meet my gaze, just waiting for my response.

So, is Siyun saying they’re okay with me now?

Am I just interpreting this in a way that favors me? Is it possible that they think of me as a close friend and thus don’t want to look like the guy from my memories when they’re beside me?

“Uh, um… Siyun…”

Even though I considered asking directly, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

“I want to be by your side, Onee-chan.”

In that moment, Siyun strongly declared once again.

Siyun’s hand, which was holding mine, tightened. They took a step closer. My vision was filled with Siyun’s face.

I could hear Siyun’s breath. My own breath matched theirs.

Siyun’s hand was warm.

“Uh, uh…”

In the end, I couldn’t continue speaking and just nodded in response.

Siyun’s face instantly lit up with joy at my answer.

“Really?”

Siyun asked.

I nodded once more.

Siyun nodded as if happy, then let go of my hand.

Siyun’s face, stepping back a bit, was… as red as mine.

Well, it was probably embarrassing for Siyun to say that. It made sense.

“Ah, um…”

Then, as if realizing what they’d just said, Siyun fumbled for a moment before exclaiming,

“I-I’ll go change!”

With that, they hurried off.

“…”

I sat down in a daze for a moment before collapsing into my seat.

And I let out a long breath.

My mind was still a jumbled mess, and rational thought hadn’t returned, but I started to think about Siyun’s words again.

So… what kind of feelings did Siyun have for me?

They hadn’t outright confessed their love. Still, they said they wanted to take the place of the person I liked.

So, that means…

My face was burning hot. Even when I touched my cheek, it felt like it was on fire. If someone had seen me, they might’ve thought I was sick.

As I slowly lowered my hand from my cheek, I could feel a slight smile forming.

“…”

But that smile didn’t last long.

My heart, which had been racing like crazy, began to settle down only after I realized I was smiling.

The person I liked.

Not someone I liked in the past, but someone I still liked.

Even if it was before Siyun confessed, and we’ve never really gone out together.

Still, I was definitely still in love with Siyun.

I hadn’t even sorted through these feelings yet.

And if I manage to sort out my feelings for Siyun… would I be able to free myself from the guilt I felt towards them? Could I live on, smiling without feeling sorry for Siyun?

Thinking like that made my soaring heart drop down, down, like it was crashing. My heart felt incredibly heavy, dropping to the ground.

“What should I do?”

But still, the answer remained elusive.

Perhaps, that answer is something I must find on my own.

No matter what conclusion I reach, it seems like that was my destiny as well.

“Wow, how cowardly of me to think like this right when I hear those words…”

I muttered to myself.

Joy and guilt intertwined in a way I couldn’t express.

Yet, there was one thing I was certain of.

At the very least, I wouldn’t feel awkward being with Siyun.

Just that one thing made me happy.

“…But.”

Just a moment ago, when Siyun said that to me.

“Onee-chan…?”

I was sure they said that, right?

Not “nee-chan”…?

*

Ah, I messed up.

I blurted that out of nowhere to Onee-chan.

Wasn’t she surprised? Did she perhaps have negative thoughts about what I just said?

Strictly speaking, it was similar to confessing to someone who already has someone they like. How does someone usually react when they’re confessed to like that?

Wouldn’t they react by telling me not to say crazy things?

What would Onee-chan’s reaction be if I said, “I have a boyfriend”? Hm, to be honest, it’s hard to imagine. Of course, she’d reject me, but knowing Onee-chan, instead of bluntly cutting me off and rejecting me sharply, she would probably say “That’s difficult” a few times before saying no. But she wouldn’t leave any leeway.

At least, based on the fact that Onee-chan hasn’t gotten a boyfriend until now, that’s how it seemed.

“…”

Thinking about that, a rather shallow and selfish feeling began to well up in my chest.

The joy of knowing that Onee-chan had only looked at me makes me think she still likes me—

—I know that’s a thought I shouldn’t have. If I understood how much pain Onee-chan experienced due to her feelings for me, I should never have thought that way.

Rather, if Onee-chan had someone she truly loved, I should be grateful for that. Even if not, I believed I should pray for her to forget her past self and look towards the future.

I think that…

So, she is saying she will help me.

In a corner of my mind, a low voice questioned what it meant to be a former hero.

That voice tickled my ears and spread a beautiful sound.

All she’s doing is helping me forget what she feels about me by being by her side. And for that place, it’s going to be you.

I just have to smile next to her like now. Laughing together, growing closer, I just have to become someone she never wants to lose.

In the end, everyone has that special person. It just happens to be you filling that empty space.

Right?

No, that’s not right.

It shouldn’t be that way… Even though I thought that, the thrill of having just received the permission to be by Onee-chan’s side surged from deep within my chest.

That was something I couldn’t deny.

*

Once I changed my clothes and stepped outside, Onee-chan was standing.

The bright red face from before had calmed down a bit.

“Cough.”

She coughed awkwardly upon seeing me. Then, as she stood there, she spoke in a slightly haughty voice.

“Well then, let’s have a good day today too.”

“…Yes.”

I found her incredibly cute.

Just a while ago, when I stood facing Onee-chan.

Even now, I could distinctly feel that I was a bit taller. Onee-chan, whose hand was held by me, was looking up at me.

The way she looked up at me with her moist eyes was truly adorable. Of course, I didn’t have any intention of doing anything in that moment.

There was still distance between us. The permission I received from Onee-chan was merely that I could come closer; it wasn’t that I was glued to her side just yet.

“…”

“…”

We stood side by side in silence.

Both of us were quietly gazing ahead.

“Siyun.”

“Yes, Onee-chan.”

“Uh, um.”

Having called me first, Onee-chan seemed flustered at my response and flinched.

Then, placing her hand over her mouth, she cleared her throat again.

Rather than looking this way, she asked while staring out the other window.

“You’re wearing the necklace today too.”

“Ah…”

I brought my hand to the side of my neck.

The necklace felt warm from my body temperature. When I touched it, I could feel the finely crafted silver edges.

“Yes, it’s because you gave it to me, Onee-chan.”

“…”

In fact, I hadn’t taken it off since yesterday.

I was a bit embarrassed because my companions noticed my necklace late and threw a big fuss to congratulate me, but I still didn’t plan on taking it off.

Because it was the first gift I received from Onee-chan after coming to this world.

I wondered if the gifts I received before were still with Mom.

When I eventually meet Mom, I would like to verify that too. Of course, I wouldn’t be able to meet her as myself… but if I became close enough with Onee-chan, maybe the three of us could meet.

And Onee-chan could tell me all sorts of things about the memories.

Thankfully, that presence was also me.

So, I wouldn’t feel the need to experience any intense jealousy. I wouldn’t mind just getting lost in the memories together.

“Cough.”

Once again, for the third time, Onee-chan coughed.

Even if the atmosphere had returned to normal, it was apparent that things remained awkward.

Uneasily, I looked at Onee-chan, who continued to glance out the opposite window and asked,

“Oh, do you have time today?”

“Eh? Uh, yes.”

Last night, I had the birthday party with my companions. But still, I couldn’t ignore the preparations made. Though it was a relatively calm party, it was still fun enough. I finished the cake, and we ate all the food we prepared.

So, even though I’d return a little late today, my companions likely wouldn’t mind too much.

…No, considering Kalia, who had been enthusiastic this morning, if I go in without any accomplishment, she might rant about it.

As I thought about that, I responded that I had time.

“Then after work today…”

Cough, I heard her cough for the fourth time.

“I-I’d like to….”

Onee-chan paused for a moment, then looked at me as if she’d made a decision.

There was a determined look on her face.

“Do you want to get a drink?”

“Ah…”

Uh, I didn’t see that coming.

 

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