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Have you ever heard the term “survival thief”? It’s used to describe those who resort to stealing out of necessity to survive. But a thief is still a thief, right? If we call it “survival theft” because of the reasoning behind it, then I must not be your average thief either.

Right now, Riche is accompanying me by chance, but she was originally one of the main heroines destined to save the world alongside the protagonist, Arthur. With such a fate, she has to become stronger than others. For that, this artifact is necessary.

However, we don’t have enough money to participate in the auction. So, naturally, we resort to theft; in this case, it could be seen as a “rescue-type thief” to save the world… wouldn’t that be correct?

So I picked up a glass bottle that was lying around on the floor. I held it out toward the guards and said,

“Excuse me, may I have a drink of this delicious-looking beverage?”

“Stop! Don’t move!”

The guards couldn’t pinpoint our exact location, aiming their swords and spears in a fan shape, ready to counter any attack from any direction. They probably had to do that because we hadn’t yet removed the bracelet and our appearances weren’t visible.

But wait, the world is on the verge of destruction, right? Isn’t there someone here to save you? What if she gets angry and doesn’t save you during the final battle later? I set the glass bottle down and picked up a sword that looked unnecessarily flashy.

“Then can I take this ridiculously cool-looking sword?”

“Stop talking nonsense and put that down right now!”

“Not this. Not that. If so, it seems I have no choice but to switch to being a robbery-type thief.”

This is what happens with the ignorant. They can’t see beyond their immediate benefits. It’s a foregone conclusion that the Demon God will invade the Empire someday. In that case, I’ll let them experience just a taste of that disaster. I pulled out my sword from the inventory and said,

“Luna, Riche. Kill them all.”

“…If you’re going to do that, was there even a reason to infiltrate secretly?”

“If there are no witnesses, it’s assassination. That’s also infiltration.”

Assassination is about killing without being noticed by others. Infiltration is about sneaking in unnoticed. The commonality is that you shouldn’t be caught by anyone. So if there are no witnesses, isn’t it both assassination and infiltration? Just as Luna and I were about to charge, Riche’s surprise attack overwhelmed the guards.

-Bam!

The flames enhanced by the artifact showed their power. The area scorched bore an unnatural sight, as if it had melted away.

“What the…? You suddenly got this strong?”

“That’s the effect of the ring you’re wearing.”

Even the one casting the magic was surprised by the firepower. That’s why artifacts are so expensive. Even though we only managed to recover two artifacts, both were of such outstanding performance that it’s hard to overstate. I couldn’t precisely assess the guards’ levels, but judging from how dazed they were after one attack, they couldn’t be that tough.

“Now, now, everyone. The disaster doesn’t wait, you know?”

They come and go as they please, just like a disaster. Even if you’re dazed by the overwhelming force of the enemy, the disaster will claim your life. I swung my sword and beheaded two guards in one go. Simultaneously, Luna assassinated two guards on the opposite side.

After eliminating all the guards clustered at the entrance and stepping outside, we found the hallway already filled with guards lined up.

“Ha… why are there so many? This is annoying.”

If I had known it would be like this, I should have just stayed back at the lodging. I could have sent the three, including Yui, to do all the work. I unnecessarily made Yui clean up.

“Well, we have no choice. We need to take care of this quickly and escape.”

“Why not just turn back time for an hour instead?”

“Is such a thing possible?”

“Of course it is.”

I took out a bomb from my inventory. With my Killer Queen by my side, nothing could be impossible.

“If I blow this up, we can turn back time by one hour.”

“…Doesn’t that just eliminate the process and leave only the result?”

Oh… I guess that’s one way to look at it. It’s the question of whether it’s more like Dio’s The World or Bruno’s King Crimson.

“Regardless, it’s a given that we’ll blow it up. Let’s light the fuse and think later.”

“You’re going to involve us in this…?”

“Do you think you and Luna would die from a bomb?”

Now? If it’s just that much, it’d be better to die now. There’ll be things far worse than bombs later on; compared to that, bombs are a piece of cake.

“Quick, light it before more guards come!”

“Got it…”

The fire leapt from Riche’s finger to the fuse. Right after the spark, Riche hid behind me and conjured a protective barrier with her magical power, while Luna did the same behind me.

Seeing the fuse ignite, the guards hurried to escape. Their speed increased as the fuse burned shorter, but I wasn’t about to just watch. It’d be great if they could dodge it, but I took the bomb, which was near the detonation, and threw it toward the guards.

-Boom!!

As the bomb exploded and the smoke cleared, what remained in the hallway were the fallen guards and us standing unscathed. Well, that was only in the hallway. In the gigantic hall at the auction entrance, there were guards re-spawning like monsters.

“Are you serious? Do we have to face them all the way up?”

“I think so.”

“Ha… annoying.”

Just as I was about to pull out another bomb, Luna sneaked up beside me and asked,

“By the way, Luke, what are your plans for the aftermath?”

“What about the aftermath?”

“They’ll probably investigate since it’s one of the royal family’s favorite places.”

“Hmmm…”

Thinking about it, that makes sense. They wouldn’t sit idly by if the operation center of the highest-ranking individuals suddenly got cleaned out overnight. Even if I don’t wait until morning, just delaying here a little longer would bring reinforcements. Not regular knights but assassins who work in the shadows like this.

“I guess we’ll have to handle it appropriately and run away.”

How strong could those tough guys really be? It’d be fine even if I took them all out, but staying up all night isn’t really my thing. Sleep is important. So I’ll just blow up a few bombs and get away. I’ve got that artifact I got for situations just like this. If I use this, even if the Empire investigates, I will be absolved from suspicion.

I pulled out the invisibility mask I had packed away in my inventory and put it on. As I released the bracelet to deactivate the invisibility, Luna and Riche’s gasps were full of surprise at my slowly revealing appearance.

“Luke…?”

“That look…”

The reason Luna and Riche were astonished was that the face I had changed into with the mask was someone they both knew well. Particularly for Riche, she probably saw it enough to be sick of it. The current appearance of me wearing the mask would look to others like a man with red hair and reddish-brown eyes.

“I kept this for times like this.”

Why would I keep a toilet, which can be annoying to look at, alive? From another person’s perspective, that might sound strange. But the reason I kept the toilet around was that it has so many uses right now. For instance, when I need to deal with something like this, I can just put on the mask of a toilet and pass off all the bothersome tasks.

‘Sure, wearing the toilet’s look is kind of unpleasant.’

Anyway, having ignited the fuse of the bomb while in the toilet form, I hurled it among the guards and sprinted toward the entrance.

“My name is Arthur!”

-Boom!!

*

The next day.

Like always, Arthur awoke early in the morning and swung his sword around in the Training Grounds, but today, he seemed unable to focus. Unlike his body, which was accustomed to the motions from swinging so often, his mind was a chaotic mess.

‘Riche…’

It has only been two days since she dropped out. Even though it had only been two days since his heroine had disappeared from the Academy, a situation as absurd as that left Arthur feeling unsettled. Was this how the protagonists in NTR novels felt? If he had a mentor, he would have probably gotten a hit for having so many distracting thoughts regarding his sword.

Having gone through so much, he thought he could shrug off trivial matters, but now with the main heroine dropping out, Arthur was feeling disoriented.

It would be fine if it was a sub-heroine, but the main heroine dropping out? Arthur set down his sword and splashed water on his face with both hands. In that moment, he spotted knights clad in white armor marching into the Academy, unmistakably belonging to the royal house.

‘What’s going on…?’

With the royal insignia on their armor, Arthur figured out their affiliation without needing to pay close attention. Given there had been many incidents at the Academy, he deduced they must be related to one of those. Just as Arthur picked up his sword again to focus on training—

Suddenly, the knights whose eyes met Arthur’s began to walk straight toward him. Then, out of nowhere, the knights drew their swords and aimed them all at Arthur.

“We arrest you on charges of theft and terrorism! Surrender quietly!”

“Wha?!”

What is happening?! Why are they suddenly accusing me of theft and terrorism?! I’ve never stolen anything at all, and I certainly haven’t committed any acts of terrorism! I haven’t even left the Academy for months; where would I have found the time for theft and terrorism?

‘What in the world is this event?!’

This was a completely unheard-of situation. Perhaps I’ve been possessed for too long and forgotten some event? He thought hard, but nothing came to mind. No, if it was an event where the protagonist gets dragged away by knights, he definitely would have remembered that.

“W-Wait! There must be some misunderstanding!”

“Enough with the nonsense! Follow us! It’s a royal command, so you have no right to refuse!”

“R-Royal command?!”

“You’d better come quietly!”

Click. Before he knew it, handcuffs were locked around Arthur’s wrists. And there, on that quiet morning where no one was awake yet, Arthur was taken away by the knights.

 

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